With Our Young Nation (ON HIATUS FOR THE MOMENT)
by TelepathicTimelord180
Summary: He wants to prove his greatness. She is two years ahead in her education, thanks to her father. Philip Hamilton and Theodosia Burr have just met, and their friendship has begun. Where will it take them? Philip/Theodosia, modern day. Rated T for romance and maybe language. I forgot to say in chap. 1- all characters are real people, based on Lin-Manuel Miranda's Hamilton musical.
1. Kindergarten- Day 1, Morning

Philip waltzed out the door on his first day of kindergarten. He was all grown up. He was the oldest Hamilton kid in his house, and he was going to go to school and make his father proud!

His mother walked behind him, ushering him out the door. "Now, Philip, have a good day at school, sweetie! I hope- oh, dear." Eliza Hamilton's goodbye to her son was cut off by a scream and the crash of a bowl. Philip's one-year-old brother had just knocked his breakfast off the kitchen table "Oh, dear. Al. I have to clean that up. Alexander! You need to get out of the house more anyway, can you take your son to school, _please?_ " A grunt from inside the house signaled Philip's father's approval. Eliza turned back to Philip and put her hands on his shoulders. "Philip, I'll see you later. Make sure to blow everyone away!" With one last kiss on the cheek, she swept her dress around and rushed back in.

A second later, fumbling with a packet of papers and his glasses nearly falling off his face, Philip's father showed up at the door. Despite his frantic state, the man managed a grin. "All ready, big boy?" Philip smiled. It was exciting, going to school. He couldn't wait to tell everyone that his father was Alexander Hamilton, who had some big political position. Philip didn't really know, but he had seen his father's name in the paper and sometimes picked up parts of his dad's rambling conversations.

As they walked to Princeton Elementary School, Philip imagined what it would be like. He assumed he would make a lot of friends really quickly, like he had in daycare. He assumed the teachers would adore him, like all adults seemed to. He assumed that no one would mess with him, and if they did, they would have to answer to his father. His fantasies were interrupted by his father's voice. The two were standing right outside the colorfully decorated door of Room 11. "Alright, Philip, we're here. You have a good day, yeah?" Philip once again was flooded with happiness. He couldn't wait to meet everyone in his class, and he was ready to make his father proud.

"Yeah, daddy! I love you!" He gave his father a quick kiss on the cheek, then didn't glance behind again as he bounced cheerfully into the classroom.

 _He'll be okay,_ thought Alexander. _I know he will._

* * *

Only a couple of people were in the room when Philip entered. One was his teacher, a pretty woman with long brown hair. The other was a young boy who was wearing a name tag that read "George". Philip walked over to him. "Hi," he said, suddenly nervous.

"Hi. Who are you?"

"I'm Philip, and my daddy is Alexander Hamilton! He's really famous."

"I'm George. My daddy doesn't like your daddy. He says he's no good."

Philip was outraged. How dare this boy say anything against his precious father? His father was perfect. He was smart, rich, and everyone knew him! "Well," Philip countered, " _you're_ ugly. My daddy isn't ugly. Or stupid. Or-"

"Georgie?"

A new voice came from across the room. A girl had entered. She was smaller than Philip and George, and looked younger. Her dark hair was braided carefully and she wore a pretty white dress, but it had a mud stain on the front of it that looked fresh. "Hi Georgie!" She hustled across the room and wrapped her arms around the other boy, who looked slightly alarmed and embarrassed.

"Hi, Theodosia-"

"Yeah, I'm Theo! I like horses! I'm only three but my daddy's daddy used to be the principal and so _my_ daddy got me in early! He says I'm really smart! What's your name? Are you really smart?" She turned her large eyes toward Philip, who was quite shocked at this hyper girl's sudden appearance.

"Well," he began, " my name is Philip. A bunch of people said I'm smart. I think I'm smart. I-" He was cut off by the teacher, who stood at the front of the room and told them to find a seat.

"I'm sitting with Georgie," said the chipper girl. "He's my friend. Do you want to be my friend?"

"Sure," said Philip. He liked Theodosia.

"Well, then come sit with us! Friends sit together! You can be Georgie's friend too." George grumbled a little but followed Theodosia, who grabbed Philip by the arm and pulled him over to a desk.

"Ok," Philip replied. He was going to impress George somehow. He was going to make his father proud of him. And he was going to be the best friend to Theodosia ever.


	2. Kindergarten- Day 1, Afternoon & Evening

**Notes: Hello! Welcome to my fanfiction! I forgot to add an author's note to my first chapter (also, I'm new to this, is there any official way I'm supposed to add one? If so PLEASE let me know, thanks!), so here is one now. This is my first fully-dedicated fanfiction, it's a modern-day AU, and I hope you enjoy. That's all I really have to say, besides the fact that I don't own the characters. They are versions real historical figures (I might add an OC in somewhere but they probably won't be a prominent character), based on the character interpretations from Lin-Manuel Miranda's genius musical** ** _Hamilton_** **. Plus I have taken a few liberties- for instance, George Eacker was not actually Philip's age. Again, I hope you like it and please let me know how I can improve! :)**

When the school day was over, Philip was even more excited than he had been that morning. His teacher led the class to the cafeteria for dismissal, where they waited for their parents.

"I liked learning about the alphabet today. I already knew some of it though. My mommy taught me a little!" Theodosia seemed no less cheerful as she had that morning. Suddenly she noticed someone waving for her- a woman who resembled Theo very closely. Philip inferred that was Theo's mother, as she promptly got up and started to run towards the woman before stopping one last time. "Bye Georgie and Philip! You are my friends!" She tried to wrap her arms around George again, but he pushed her off lightly. She was only deterred for a moment, turning to Philip and putting a smile on her face once more. She gave him a quick, light hug, different from the tight one he had seen her give George that morning. Then, waving once more, she ran off towards her mother.

George and Philip watched Theo go, and once she and her mother were gone, the boys turned to each other. They stayed silent. Theodosia was the only reason they had interacted at all after meeting that day, and they weren't about to become best friends now. Fortunately Philip heard his name being called, and looking up, he saw his mother holding his younger brother Al and the hand of his sister Angie. He briefly glanced at George before scampering away.

"Hi Mom!" He embraced his mother.

"Hi, Phil! You seem excited," she commented, ruffling his hair. Angie stood at her side, pouting. Obviously she did not like being dragged along to Philip's school. Nevertheless, she smiled slightly when Philip came over to them.

"Yeah! School was fun! I have a friend."

"Oh, really? Who is it?" His mother's face shone with genuine interest and care as the family began to walk home. The Hamiltons didn't live far from Princeton Elementary, it was only a block away from their house, and it only took them about five minutes to get from one place to the other.

"Well, I have two friends. One of them is called George but I don't like him very much. The other one is called Theodosia." He pronounced the name slowly and carefully, because it was long and he didn't want to mess up in front of his mom.

"That's very nice, dear. Maybe you could invite them over sometime?"

"Sure! Except I don't really want George to come over. He's mean sometimes. He said bad things about Dad. But I like Theodosia a lot. She could come over."

Once more, Eliza Hamilton smiled. Her child was growing up so fast. She wondered where his life would take him.

* * *

It was mildly crowded at the Hamilton family's kitchen table that night, as always. Alexander sat with Eliza on his left and Angie on his right, across from Philip. Al's booster seat was next to Eliza so she could feed the youngest child. Angie was picking grumpily at her green beans and Al was flinging food that he disliked back at his mother. Alexander and Eliza shared a quick smile at the craziness of their growing family, then Alexander switched his attention to Philip. "So! How was your first day of Kindergarten?"

Philip giggled. He had so much to talk about! "It was good! I made some friends."

"Oh, nice! And who are they?" Alexander switched places with Eliza and began to feed his younger son while humoring Philip's excitement by pampering him with questions.

"One of them is George, and the other one is Theodosia…"

Alexander's face fell. It became a look of surprise, suspicion, and cold anger all at once. Trying to keep his calm, he responded carefully: "Theodosia… _who_ , Phil? What was her last name?"

Not sensing any problem, Philip happily continued talking. "Something like 'bird' or 'fur' or something like that. Our teacher only told us once. She called roll at the beginning of class. And guess what, daddy! When she got to my name I could tell she knew that my last name was famous! I bet she knows who you are from the news or something! Daddy, isn't that cool?"

"Yeah, Phil. Sure is." Alexander replied in a deadpan. Only Eliza could tell, but Philip's father knew who his son's new best friend was, and he was not happy with it.

* * *

Philip was in bed. His mother had just tucked him in and kissed him goodnight. He was full, he was happy, and he was content- except for one thing. He was still waiting for his father to come say goodnight to him. It was an evening ritual- Alexander _always_ came and said goodnight to Philip. Even being one of the busiest politicians around, he always found time to. Tonight, he was late, and Philip wanted to know why.

Through the wall of his room, he heard a noise. The young boy jumped, at first scared of a monster coming into his room, but soon realized that his father had just walked by and gone into his office. Philip was confused, and sat pondering this for a couple of seconds until he heard something else: several beeps coming from the office next door. The sound was familiar- the dialing of the house phone. Why would his father be calling someone this late at night before coming to see him?

At the edge of his bed with his ear pressed against the wall, Philip waited to hear what happened next. For a second it was quiet until-

"Alexander!" A muffled sound came from the phone, and Philip could just barely make out the words.

"Aaron Burr, _sir_."

"And just why exactly am I being graced with your voice tonight, Alex?"

"Your daughter. Theodosia. Yes?" That startled Philip. What did Theo have to do with anything? And why did his father sound so angry about her?

"What about her?"

"Why is she in my son's Kindergarten class? She's only three!"

"Because she's smart, and because I have influence. My father used to be the principal, you see."

"I don't care, Burr. Just keep her away from my son. He won't shut about her!" Had he really been talking about her _that_ much? Okay, he probably had, but why did anyone care?

"I don't see how I can _keep her away_ , Alexander, when this is the best elementary school in the area and I doubt that either one of us is willing to forfeit that. What's so bad about them being friends anyway?" That's precisely what Philip wanted to know.

His father's voice softened a bit. "It's not so much _them_ , Burr, as it is us. Let's face it- we're friends but we don't get along. I just want my son to be happy, and having us as fathers will endanger that."

The other voice had become cold. "Alexander, if you want your son to be happy, you should let him be friends with a perfectly nice person who he likes and gets along with. I don't foresee anything particularly good coming out of their being friends, but it's not our place to interfere just yet. Besides, I'm not pulling _my_ daughter out of an excellent school so you can ruin _your_ child's social life by trying to help them."

"Burr-"

"Goodnight, Alexander."

"Burr, just listen-!"

"Good _night_ , Alexander."

"Burr- hey!"

But the line had gone dead.

Slinking back under his covers, Philip tried to contemplate what he'd just heard, but he was exhausted and confused, and nothing stopped him from slipping into a deep sleep with no further thought put into the situation.


	3. Kindergarten- Day 2, Morning

**Notes: This is a pretty short chapter because I though this interaction was important but didn't know how to turn it into a longer plot point, so I left it at this. I realize now that for a 3- and 5-year-old, their dialogue seems kind of mature, but it's easier to write like that, and I'm mostly basing them off of family friends who are about 6, so they end up sounding more like that age (I think so, anyway, rereading the other chapters). Anyway, enjoy! Thank you to anyone who commented, favorited, or followed. Much appreciated.**

"Bye, sweets!" Eliza called to her son as he hastily gave her a kiss and ran off towards his school. Philip was even more excited than he had been the day before. Today, his mother wasn't required to walk him all the way to his classroom like Alexander had yesterday, and even though Eliza had fussed over him about how she was worried that he'd get lost on the way there, Philip wanted to go on his own. It made him feel grown up and responsible, and he wanted to impress everyone with his independence.

Philip hadn't forgotten the conversation he had overheard the previous night. It worried him. He didn't want to stop talking to Theo, but he had to make his father happy. He couldn't let him down. He would have to end their friendship. His father would be proud of him, he knew. He would do it, in class, that morning.

When Philip got to class, he saw that Theodosia was already there. His excitement had dulled slightly at his realization of what he had to do, but he was going to be strong. He took a deep breath, set down his backpack, and walked over to Theo.

When she noticed him, Theo jumped up in excitement and ran over to him, giving him a big hug. "Hi Philip! I missed you." Philip tried to lightly push her away. He was terrified about what he was about to tell her, but he had to do it.

"Um… Theodosia… my daddy doesn't think we should be friends."

At first, Theo only seemed confused, not upset. "But… why? Does he hate me?" That was when the sadness started to show. Her bottom lip shook a little. Philip could see she was trying not to cry. He felt horrible.

"Well, I kind of spied on him so I'm not supposed to know about it, but he said that he wants me to be happy and your daddy is not going to get along with mine and something like that…" He trailed off. What was he doing?

Theodosia looked up. Her eyes were a little bit wet, but she seemed to have come up with an idea. "Let's not tell him, then."

Philip was slightly shocked at the idea- lie to his father? What kind of terrible idea was that? "But… that's lying. Mommy said lying was wrong. We shouldn't lie."

Theodosia, however, seemed set on the idea. "But it's good, in this case, because everyone is happy! He's happy because he doesn't know we're friends, and we're happy because we _are_ friends!"

Once again, Philip tried to protest. "What about your daddy? Do we have to lie to him too?"

"Maybe. It doesn't matter." Theodosia finished with a nod. Philip sighed. There was nothing he could do. Clearly, nothing would change Theo's mind. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea anyway. As long as it worked, everything would be good in the end.

"Okay. I guess we can try it." At that moment, George rushed in, interrupting their conversation. Soon, the teacher called them to their seats, and that day's lesson began. Philip wasn't paying much attention, though. He was thinking about Theodosia, and how close he came to losing his new best friend.


	4. For Theodosia

**Notes: I'm not really sure what this chapter is, and frankly, I'm not very happy with it. But the important thing is: it's here, and it's a plot point that I needed to get in somehow! It takes place when Philip and Theo are in third grade. My plan for ages is to continue moving them up, mostly sporadically until I get to age nineteen, where the plot will pick up. I do not own the characters,** ** _Hamilton_** **, or** ** _Fur Elise._** **Thank you for the favorites, follows, etc. They make me happy. Enjoy!**

*****February- a piano recital, at Princeton Elementary*****

Philip sat at the piano. He was distracted. Over two hundred kids and parents from his school were staring at him, and he couldn't seem to focus.

But the many people weren't the problem. He'd performed plenty of times before. It was Theodosia and her parents that were the problem.

The two had stayed friends after meeting in Kindergarten. George was still friends with Theo too, and Philip and George had learned to tolerate each other. The trio taken their first three-and-a-half years of education by storm, and were ready to move on to the upper grades. They were led mostly by Theo, being the youngest but also the bossiest. Over the course of the few years, their classmates had stayed with them, as it was a small school with only one class per grade. Philip, George, and Theo had learned their way around and established general rules: who to avoid and who to be nice to, when it was unacceptable to speak out against the teacher and when it was witty and appreciated, what to say and what not to say.

The first part of that was the easiest for Philip. He categorized his classmates by basic personality and actions, and let those reputations stay firmly in place. He had his group of friends, Theo and George, whom he referred to as the Close Ones. There were two girls in his class, Dolly and Martha, who would always look at him and giggle. He called them the Silly Ones. There was a boy called Joseph, who would blush and look away anytime Theodosia got close. Philip didn't trust him. He called Joseph the Red One, after his notorious blushing. It was simple to Philip, and he liked it that way.

Theodosia was the difficult one. They had managed to keep their friendship quiet, to please their parents, but it was hard. They hadn't ever told George about their agreement, so he was a risk. He could tell anyone he wanted about Theo and Philip being friends, but Philip sensed that he knew that it would hurt Theodosia and wouldn't risk it. So they had managed. They had hidden the fact that they even talked anymore. And it worked.

Yet he was nervous today, because he wanted to talk to Theodosia, wanted desperately to impress her with his music, but he couldn't do anything that would let their fathers know about them! He sat on the hard piano bench and took a deep breath. _Over a hundred people are waiting. I just need to play._

He tested the first note. A phone started ringing somewhere in the audience, throwing him off. Briefly, he glanced back. Theodosia's mom was fumbling with her purse, trying to stop the ring. Theo's father was watching his wife. Theo was only watching Philip. Wide eyes, an encouraging smile, she never took her attention away.

Philip turned back to the piano. The phone had stopped making sound. He started to play.

The notes started a little slowly- he hit a wrong note at one point- but soon they came easily. He was playing Beethoven's _Für Elise_ , but it was not "for Elise", as the title suggested. It was for Theodosia. He wanted to make her proud, wanted to impress her, wanted to show her that he was an excellent musician.

When the song was over, Philip was almost scared to leave the piano, to turn around and see the girl that he had tried so hard to blow away with his music. He was worried that she would be upset or dissatisfied with it, but no. He turned around and as he was heading to his seat, stole a glance at Theo. She was beaming. She was trying so hard, he could tell, to not look at him, to contain her smile. They had worked themselves into a difficult situation, where everything was always on the line and the consequences kept growing. But there was no going back now.

* * *

Theodosia Burr couldn't keep her smile in. Right before he'd started to play, Philip had locked eyes with her, and she couldn't forget that. He was such a nice friend, always so kind and sweet, and yet they were so… _separate_ , because they had to be.

She couldn't forget that they needed to stay apart. She didn't. But what she _did_ do was something very risky: she looked back over at him, standing with his parents, having descended from the stage where the piano was. Her father and mother were looking away, so she took the opportunity. He was cheerfully babbling to his mother, who was holding his little brother James' hand and gently shushing Philip, as Dolly was preparing to play a song. Theo hadn't even realized that she had been staring until Philip's father looked up. Upon making eye contact with the young girl, his eyes narrowed and Theo hastily glanced away. Dolly started to play, but Theo couldn't devote all of her attention to the tune. She was worried about Mr. Hamilton, and what he would do. As she listened to Dolly's song, she felt dread fill her up. She had ruined it all.

* * *

The parking lot was cold and empty. Almost everyone else had already left, but the Burrs and the Hamiltons were still there. Aaron Burr's wife, who shared Theodosia's name, had realized that Dolly's mother went to the same college as her, thereby striking up and long conversation as Burr and young Theo waited to leave. Alexander Hamilton, however, was waiting for Burr.

Alexander rushed over to Burr, who was drifting away from his wife's conversation. As he set a hand on Burr's shoulder, Burr jumped, then, realizing who he was facing, audibly sighed. "Yes, Alexander?"

Hamilton pulled Burr farther away from the others, into a small alcove in the side of the school. "Burr, I thought my son had severed ties with your daughter. I thought it was over. I thought I didn't have to worry about your influence anymore. I thought-"

"Alexander! Calm down. My daughter is a person as much as any other kid is. I don't see why you think I'm going to ruin your son's life. Theodosia makes him happy. We shouldn't interfere."

"That's what you say, but if we fight, like we have- don't deny it! We fight all the time!- it will break their hearts!"

"Sometimes broken hearts strengthen friendships!"

"Sometimes they don't!"

"Alexander-"

"I just want my son to be happy!" He was practically roaring now. Burr was not moved.

"Yes, you've made that clear. But come one, Alex. They've gone so far as to hide this from us- well, mostly from _you_. They're frightened. That's not how you make someone happy. Let's try letting them be. Until something actually happens where my daughter affects your son in a bad way, we let go."

"Daddy?" As Alexander was about to answer, a high-pitched voice came from around the corner. Theodosia, ran up to her father and gave him a tight hug. Then she realized who he had been talking to. She froze, then began to back away.

"Wait!" Burr stretched out a hand to Theodosia, who, rather reluctantly, grabbed hold of it. "Mr. Hamilton has something he'd like to say."

Hamilton made eye contact with Burr. "Until something goes wrong?" Hamilton mouthed.

Burr nodded. "Deal. We let them be."

Bending down to level his face with Theo's, Alexander smiled. "I heard that you and my little Philip are friends. Maybe you can come over sometime, and spend some time at our place with him?"

Theodosia looked suspicious, but nodded carefully. She looked worried about what Hamilton's motives might be for suddenly being so nice, but decided to accept it.

As Burr and Theodosia headed towards their car where Burr's wife was already waiting, Alexander thought about what he'd just done. Had it been the right thing? He'd find out soon enough.


	5. When You Smile

**Notes: Thanks to everyone who has read, favorited, commented, followed, etc. You make me happy. This chapter was me attempting non-romantic fluff, and I don't really know how it went, but oh well. For anyone whose school used a normal name for them, Sock Hops are like party-dance things that we had in elementary school. Also, someone (I couldn't reply, they were a guest) in the comments asked if there was a Joseph in the musical: no. Joseph is supposed to be Theo's real life husband, Joseph Alston. He will become important eventually... (evil laughter) I don't own the characters, the musical, Oreos, or the Cha Cha Slide. Enjoy, as always!**

*****September- the Hamilton household, before a school "Sock Hop"*****

~Philip is age 10, Theo is 9. They are in 5th Grade.~

"Come on, it'll be fun!"

"But I don't WANT to go."

"Philip…"

Philip was sitting at the desk in his room, playing on his father's phone. "I'm _busy_."

Eliza, clearly deciding that she would have none of that, marched over to Philip and snatched the phone from his hands. "Hey!" He whined, but his attention was focused on his mother rather than the game he'd just been playing.

"This," Eliza scolded, "is _exactly_ why you're not getting a phone."

Philip didn't respond directly to that, but under his breath muttered, " _Georgie_ has a phone."

His mother overheard that and frowned. "George plays two sports and is part of several community and school clubs! Not to say that your poetry and piano talents aren't great, but you never leave the house unless you have to, which is another reason you should-"

"I DON'T WANT TO GO TO THE SOCK HOP!"

"You're not social. We're going to the sock hop. You'll like it, your friends will probably be there. Theodosia's mother says she wants Theo to go."

This fact shut Philip up. " _Fine_ , I'll go. But only if I have to." Turning to his desk, he took out his poetry journal and grumpily turned to an empty page. "What kind of name for a school party even _is_ 'Sock Hop'?" The boy grumbled. He would go, if only for Theodosia and his mother. But he wasn't going to enjoy it.

* * *

*****Same day- in the Princeton Elementary School cafeteria*****

The cafeteria was brightly decorated with fake Hawaiian flowers, posters of beach scenery, colorful ceiling lights, and a large DJ stand. A popular song was playing at top volume and a table in the back was set up with cookies and cups of fruit punch. To most of the kids there, especially the younger ones, it seemed like their school had become a tropical-themed heaven. To Philip, it was close enough to hell.

He hated the bright lights, hated the ear-splitting popular songs, hated the store-brand Oreos and fruit punch, hated that there was nowhere in peace where he could sit and write or just simply observe everyone else. He regretted his decision to come. He only wanted to please his mother and Theodosia. Why did this have to be his method for doing that?

Where _was_ Theo, anyway? Philip looked up. The room was so crowded, he could barely see who was five feet in front of him, much less spot his smaller, nine-year-old friend. Sighing, he tried to squirm through the masses to get to the farthest away spot from the DJ as possible, when a hand grabbed his shoulder.

"Ahh!" Philip exclaimed, jumping and tuning to see Theodosia's chipper face.

"Hi!" She yelled. It was so loud in the cafeteria that Philip could barely hear his friend.

"How can you like coming to these? This is horrible!" He whined, again screaming for her to hear.

Theodosia didn't seem offended. Instead, she smirked. "Come on," she said, her voice barely audible. "I've got something to show you."

She pulled Philip away from where they were standing, through the crowds, and to the door that led to the hallway. A teacher was standing there, and stepped in front of the exit. "Woah, kids. Where are you going?"

Philip opened his mouth to respond, but Theodosia cut him off. "Philip has to go to the bathroom and doesn't want to go alone because the school is so empty. I'm going to go with him so he doesn't get lost."

The teacher smiled. "Okay, but don't go too far into the school."

Theo returned the grin. "Alright, thank you!" She headed into the hallway, and Philip followed tentatively. They went down a hall that led away from the cafeteria, and partway down had a door that Philip had never seen before.

"Teacher's' Lounge," Theo said, as if she recognized Philip's confusion.

"But… we're not allowed-"

"They don't lock it, and no one will be in here now." She reached for the handle. "It'll be quiet. We can hang out."

Philip nodded a little, but glanced behind him. This felt wrong, they were breaking the rules, and what if a teacher came by and saw them? But no- the coast was clear. The teacher in the cafeteria's view was blocked. "Wait," he said, reaching out to stop Theo from opening the door. "How do you know all this? About it being safe and unlocked, I mean?"

A sly smile crept onto Theo's face. "I have… connections. My grandpa used to be the principal, remember. My father's had to have meetings here sometimes, because the staff know him, and I… well, I _may_ have eavesdropped just a little..."

Philip couldn't help it: he grinned a bit. "Okay, if we don't get caught." He released his hold on her arm and she pushed open the door.

The Teacher's Lounge was small and smelled like old milk, but it was cozy. After Theodosia closed the door, the music was quieted, and they were alone.

"See? I told you it'd be peaceful."

"I can still hear the music," he pointed out stubbornly.

"Yeah, but it's a better volume now, right?" She was right. It felt to Philip like the volume he would normally play his music at- which was surprising, seeing as how they were all the way down a hallway from the cafeteria and had the door closed. The two kids sat in silence for a little while Philip examined the room. Theo had obviously been in here before, but Philip had never. The second graders' art was hung around the sink area. There was a refrigerator and- Philip rejoiced- a vending machine against one wall and a table with some chairs against the other. He had to admit, it was a nice hideaway.

"Hey," Theodosia said, setting down on the table a small purse that she'd been carrying around with her. "It's the Cha Cha Slide. Wanna dance?"

"No," Philip retorted. He'd always hated the Cha Cha Slide. He always felt like he was messing up the steps and everyone was watching him.

Theodosia put on a fake pouty face. "Come on… _please_?" Philip laughed. "No one can judge you here."

"You could."

"I won't."

Philip suppressed a smile. " _Fine_ ," he whined. He got up and Theo grabbed his arm while they started to do the simple step. "I feel ridiculous," he complained.

"No one cares."

"Hey!"

There was Theo's sly smile back on her face. "I'm just trying to have some fun."

"I'd rather have food. Do you have money for the vending machine?"

"Maybe."

"You do."

"Yeah, I do. I _guess_ we can stop, if we _must_." She over exaggerated her whining tone, and Philip guessed she didn't really care about doing the dance, but just wanted something to do. He took the dollar she handed him and bought a bag of M &Ms. Theo bought a Reese's bar and sat down at the table next to Philip. They sat in awkward silence except for the Slide playing for a few seconds, until Philip broke it.

"So."

"So."

"Hello."

"Hi."

"Where's George?" The question was random, but Philip had just realized the absence of their usual companion.

Theo shrugged. "He had a baseball game to go to." Philip nodded. He hadn't particularly cared about where George was in the first place. In fact, he was enjoying Theo's company more than usual, as he usually did when it was just the two of them. The rift between him and George never seemed to go away. But he had learned to ignore it, pretend that only Theodosia and him were the ones that mattered. George had such different opinions about anything, from what the boys liked to do to how they reacted to things to their daily life. Philip tolerated him, and vice versa, but Philip liked it more when it was just him and Theodosia. It was easier.

"So what do you want to do?" Theodosia asked.

Philip shrugged. "I don't know. Can we just…" He looked around. It was quiet, they were alone, and he just wanted to be with Theo for a while without any barriers. "Can we just stay here for a while?"

Theo smiled. "Sure," She turned her chair so that she was facing Philip. "Did I ever tell you about what my dad told me about when he…"

And so they sat there, a beaming grin on Theo's face and a small amused look on Philip's, talking, talking, talking until they finally headed back to the cafeteria, sneaking past the teacher and finding their parents. But even as they were parting ways, Philip was glad he had come to the Sock Hop, and glad he had Theodosia in his life.


	6. There is Something to be Said

**Notes: Hello everyone! I'm going to warn you now- this is a sad chapter. I'm also going to warn you- it may be slightly cheesy. Or maybe that's just what it sounds like to me. Anyway, thank you all so much if you have read, favorited, commented, or followed! It makes me super happy. Enjoy.**

*****May- the Hamilton household, as Philip gets home from school*****

It was on June 5th that 11-year-old Philip received the letter from Theodosia. She had been away from school for the past week- he assumed that she was sick- and the two hadn't talked in several days, though Philip had sent a letter asking about her well-being, to which he never got any reply.

On June 5th, however, a letter did arrive. It was at Philip's place at the kitchen table, where his mother always put the mail that came for him. On Friday as he rushed in after his day of school, he noticed it.

"Is that for me? It's from Theodosia!" He exclaimed, full of excitement as he grabbed it and started to open it. What he didn't notice was his mother's face falling. Eliza Hamilton had already heard the news.

Philip's face shone as he recognized Theo's scribbled penmanship. The ten-year-old was not allowed to use the family computer to send emails, so she often sent paper letters instead. She didn't care about saving time; she wrote quickly, as did Philip, and neither of them ever found any time to make their letters neat. George always wrote slowly and carefully. But George was not on Philip's mind right now- only Theodosia was. He smiled as he began to read.

 _Dear Philip,_

 _I'm sorry I missed school this week but it's kind of important. My mom was sick for a long time and she died. This is hard to write. I'm sorry._

 _I didn't want to tell you right away but daddy said you wrote a letter and thought I was sick so I thought I should tell you. I might not be at school for a while. I have to stop. I can't write about it. I'm sorry, Philip. I'm sorry._

 _Your friend,_

 _Theodosia Burr_

No, this couldn't be true. It couldn't. Frantically, Philip reread the short letter, praying that somehow the words would change, that it would be fake, that it wouldn't be real, but it was. No matter how many times he read it, it stayed the same. It was only then that Philip noticed the teardrop marks scarring the paper. A second later, a tear of his own fell, landing on the word "died" and smudging it. No, no. She couldn't be dead. Theodosia's mother couldn't be dead.

"Philip?" Eliza asked tenderly, reaching out to her son, but he turned away, not looking up, he tore out of the room and up the stairs to his room, now not only crying but bawling, wailing, not caring if he woke his brother John, not caring if he disturbed his sister Angelica from her work, not caring if four-year-old James was scared by the wail, they should be scared, they should be awake and paying attention, Theo's mother is dead, Theo's mother is dead-!

He looked up. He was at his window, eyes red from crying, body shaking a little. He had only met Theodosia the Elder a few times, barely even made her acquaintance, but he was worried about Theo, his friend. Would she ever be happy again? No one in his immediate family had died during his lifetime. He didn't know what it was like.

Philip wasn't sure whether he should respond to Theo's letter or not. On one hand, she might need consolation. He could send her a poem, maybe, or possibly even pay her a visit. On the other, she was most likely distraught and didn't want him intruding. As close as they were, Philip could see how she'd want to be left alone.

But he couldn't just let it be. In the end, he decided to write her a poem back and then let her be.

 _There is something to be said_

 _For the dead tree in winter._

 _When its leaves fall and its branches become bare_

 _The whole forest mourns with a frost_

 _The animals bury themselves and sleep through the pain_

 _The pines' arms sag with the weight of sorrow._

 _But what else?_

 _Vibrant birds brighten its barren branches._

 _A squirrel finds refuge in it._

 _A faun rests peacefully underneath._

 _There is something to be said_

 _For the dead tree in winter._

 _The forest fills with unyielding sadness_

 _But then it_

 _Finds_

 _New_

 _Hope._

 _Theodosia- I'm sorry about your mother. I hope you are okay._

 _Your friend,_

 _Philip Hamilton_


	7. Falling Down at Our Feet

**Notes: Hello everyone! Sorry for the insanely late update, I've been busy/away from wifi, so here it is now. I haven't edited, so let me know if there are any major things I need to fix. Also, more apologies for the incredibly cheesy last chapter. I read it again and it's making me cringe. Does anyone have tips for writing sad things without creating cringe-fests like that? As always, comments/favorites/follows are loved and thank you to everyone. Enjoy!**

 **(By the way this takes place about a month after the last chapter.)**

*****June- Columbia Middle School parking lot*****

"Philip? George?" The crowd was thick in the school parking lot that day. Theo was almost shaking- it had been awhile since she had been around so many people with no escape, and the deadweight of her mother's death still sat in her stomach, giving her an uneasy feeling. But she couldn't miss the rest of the school year. It seemed too soon to go back, but she had to. She had to see her friends, and finish her schoolwork, and let everyone see that she was okay and that she was strong. "Philip? George?" She called out their names again, louder this time, more than just a meek whisper. But no one answered. No one was there. She covered her ears tightly as a wave of nausea hit her. Her friends weren't there, why weren't they there? They were gone, just like her mother was gone, although her mother was never coming back-

"Theo!"

Her eyes shut and her ears covered, Theo barely registered her name being called. She had backed against a wall, letting the crowd pass around her. She was cornered, but someone had pushed through the crowd, was shaking her shoulders gently. She cautiously opened one eye and breathed out. "Philip! Thank God…" That was all she was able to get out before she choked and started to cry. _Oh no, not here, anywhere but here!_ She frantically blinked, trying to get rid of the tears, knowing Philip wouldn't want to see her like this, but no… he was pulling her in to a tight hug. He wasn't strong, and he didn't feel confident that he was doing the right thing, so she leaned into him, trying to let him know that she appreciated his embrace. But also, Philip was pulling her in tightly, maybe he could make it alright. He was familiar and kind and caring.

For the first time in a long while, Theodosia was almost happy.

Until a sharp blow to her back knocked her into Philip, pressing them both to the wall. Theo's nearly-dried tears began to fall again, even more violently than before.

What was going on? She couldn't tell. Philip had stepped in front of her, was yelling at someone. Through her blurred vision, she could make out a vague picture of a girl with long braided hair and a purple camo-print jacket. _Lucy Jefferson_ , she hazily realized. _Lucy fricking Jefferson, the biggest bully in the grade, right when I'm sobbing my eyes out. Just great._

Lucy began to speak, her sugary-sweet voice bordering on sour. "Oh, I'm _so sorry_. That was totally an accident. I guess I just couldn't ignore you, what with the ocean you're making in the middle of the hallway." At this point, Theo was fuming through the streams coming down her cheeks. She was going to stand up to Lucy Jefferson, show her who was boss once and for all, when Philip stepped in between them.

"Lucy, it's better to let everyone think you're an idiot than to open your mouth and prove it. Leave Theodosia alone. Just because you're-"

"Philip, stop it." Theodosia muttered nervously. She appreciated what Philip was doing, but she wanted to show Lucy that she didn't need anyone to defend her. On top of that, a crowd was gathering around the argument, and she knew Philip was only going to attract attention from everyone else, and she didn't need that.

"Aww, that's _so_ sweet! Your _boyfriend's_ protecting you!" Lucy squealed mockingly.

"He's not my boyfriend." Theo grumbled. "Come on, Philip, let's go."

"No! I'm not done here! Not until this prick gets put in her place! She called you out, Theo, she made you cry, I can't have that-"

"Well, go ahead and announce it to the whole school, then!" Theo screamed. This was no longer a fight between Lucy and Theo, or Lucy and Philip. It was chaos. "Philip, you're great, and I know you mean well, but please, just let me have a chance to stand up for myself sometimes? I can handle it, I'm not that young or anything!"

"But Theo, I'm just trying to help-"

"I know you're trying to help! And I'm asking you to please let it go!" More tears more embarrassment, more anger. This had to stop. Her voice shaking, she tried to be calm as she continued. "I'm going to go now. I'll see you later, Philip."

As she walked away, she heard Lucy's voice in the background, presumably talking to one of her friends. "Such an idiot. I'm surprised they let her stay in this school. Well, I suppose if she was anywhere else, she wouldn't get to be with her boyfriend.

And at that moment, Theodosia Burr turned around and slapped Lucy Jefferson full in the face.

* * *

"Theodosia-"

"I'm fine, Philip."

"But Theo-"

"I'm _fine_ , Philip."

He recognized that tone all too clearly. A million years ago, back when he was 5 years old, hearing her father on the phone with his. It was a tone of dismissal, just before Burr had hung up. And now it was being applied to him, and it stung.

Theo was standing right inside the girls' bathroom, where Philip knew she was hiding from Lucy and everyone else. Philip knew he couldn't and shouldn't go in, so he stood outside, pleading with her, but it was to no avail. He knew she wanted to be alone.

The school day hadn't started yet, despite the large numbers of people there. This was simply the before-school time where student could mull about before going to their first period. Normally, Philip, Theo, and George would wander around together until right before the first bell. Today, however, heavy-hearted Philip just headed straight for first period Algebra, a class he share with George, not Theodosia. He supposed he would have to explain to George what had happened. He took his seat and waited, waited, waited for George,

When the other boy finally entered the room, Philip began to move towards him to explain, but George cut him off with a dark stare.

"I know what happened. You _idiot_."

"How should I have known she wanted to fight Lucy herself? I was trying to protect her!"

"I know what you were _trying_ to do, and I understand. But she asked you to stop and you ignored her. Why," his voice shook with rage. "Wouldn't you stop then?"

Philip was silent, at a loss for words. Still glaring, George turned away. Philip sat down again, the weight in his heart growing heavier by the second.

* * *

Third period was over, and Philip and Theodosia hadn't looked at each other once.

It wasn't hard to avoid each other, seeing as how their seats in French class were on opposite sides of the room. But they stayed silent until they were forced to speak. Philip did struggle, though, because Lucy Jefferson sat behind Theo and kept whispering about her. Philip could tell that Theo was trying to ignore her, but it wasn't working, and his fists clenched whenever he heard Lucy speak.

Now, though, class was over, and he was going to try to make amends. He quickly packed up his stuff and went over to her desk. "Um, Theo? Can I, um… talk to you? Please?"

At this point, Philip fully expected her to push past him and leave, but to his utmost surprise she stayed. She looked into his eyes, and he could see that she was obviously hurt. Philp cleared his throat and took a deep breath.

"I'm sorry."

"I know."

"I'll try not to do it again."

"I know. Thanks."  
"I've missed you."

"Me, too. I missed you, too."

"I'm glad you're back."

"Same."

"Can we… make peace, then?"

"Of course."

They both stared at each other for a moment, then broke into grins simultaneously. They left the classroom together and headed to Science. To any bystander, it would have seemed exactly as it had been before the feud, but there were differences. Slight ones. Lucy Jefferson was meaner than ever, yet slightly more cautious when physically close to Theodosia. That slap had definitely hurt. Theo was still mourning her much-missed mother, though she was growing back into her old self again day by day. Philip was attempting to shut up more and Theo fight her own battles, even if he did slip up a few times. And all the while, the rift between Philip and George was expanding. Still, for once, almost everything in their lives was either going well or getting better. For once, nothing was falling down at their feet.


	8. The Reynolds Pamphlet

**Notes: Hello everyone. Have a chapter. This gets a bit strange towards the end but oh well. It is not as easy as I thought it would be to write about 14-/15-year-olds. Ah well. Enjoy.**

*****Summer- the Hamilton household*****

For once, nothing was falling down at his feet.

Philip, George and Theodosia had graduated from Columbia Middle School and all moved up to the local high school, King's High, just over a year ago. Now, they had managed the immense workloads, drama, and excitement for one year. Ninth grade was over. It was finally Summer.

Philip was bothered by one thing, though. His father's behavior had changed recently, with Alexander spending more time in his office and less with his family. When he was around, he was jumpy and paranoid, and when asked why, he blamed it on work. Philip was worried, and couldn't understand what was going on, until the story was released.

 _The Reynolds Pamphlet_ , they called it. A full article written by Alexander Hamilton, famous politician, friend of the president, popular leader, _Philip's own father_ , about none other than a sex scandal. Maria Reynolds and her husband, in a plot to get Hamilton's money, had ruined his life. And not just his. Because when Eliza read the portions that had been published in the newspaper, she broke.

Philip could see the damage. His father no longer made eye contact with his mother. His mother had banished Alexander from their bedroom, making him practically live in his office, where he rarely slept but sat up all night, burying himself in work. They no longer conversed at dinner, leaving it up to the children to mend the silence. Only Philip, Angie, and Al really understood why. Angie and Al were able to quiet the younger ones and comfort them when things got bad, but Philip didn't. He sat in his room, telling himself that he had to help but not being able to face any of his family. He wanted to side with his mother, but he couldn't seem to hate his father. He was scared that one day the horrible silence would dissolve to create something even worse: a battle of screams, a war between his parents, with him and the other kids stuck in the middle. He cursed himself for being a coward.

One day, he couldn't take it anymore. It was July. He hadn't left the house in several days. He needed to escape. It was simple. He would leave. Just for the day. Just to get out for a bit. And so he did.

Philip frantically scrambled around his room, trying to figure out what to take. A water bottle, for sure. A sandwich or two. His poetry journal, maybe. His ID card would probably be good. His phone and key, for practical reasons. And… his eyes lingered on a picture of him and his parents, smiling, on his first day of 3rd grade. Shaking his head, he turned away. Seeing them together before everything went wrong was too painful.

It was quiet in the house as Philip tip-toed out the door, careful to preserve the silence. As soon as he was outside, however, he let the breath that he had been holding out and ran, ran up the street, ran down the next sidewalk, ran as far as he could from his house with no real direction or goal, just to get _away_. Only when he was about to cross a busy street out of his neighborhood did he stop to take a breath and re-evaluate what he was doing.

 _Where am I?_ Philip recognized the area, and figured he could get home pretty easily. Check.

 _Am I hurt in any way?_ Short of breath, yes; physically injured, no. Although he had lost enough energy that he figured he needed to walk for a while. Check.

 _What do I do now?_ This was where he was really lost. He couldn't go to a relative's house, no one was both close by and would reliably not call his parents and send him home. His friends' houses were out of the question: he couldn't go to George's place, and Theodosia's father would kick him out…

Wait. No. Theodosia had mentioned… sometime in July, Aaron Burr was leaving for a business trip. Would he be gone now? Maybe. Holding his side, Philip tried to control his excited and exhausted breaths. Theo's house was worth a shot.

He walked quickly, pinching himself every time he thought about home, half to check if his hopes were true and that this _was_ a dream, and half to distract himself from the guilt of the panic he must be causing his family and how unhelpful he was being towards his siblings. He couldn't think about that now.

When he finally reached Theo's house, it was almost 2:00 PM. His hand shook as he lightly pushed the doorbell. _Moment of truth_.

There was a light scurrying on the other side, and a very small sound when something pushed against the door. Then the handle turned and the door opened to reveal Theo in a light purple dress holding a baseball bat at her side.

"Philip! Hi!" She seemed slightly shaken but cheery as ever. Philip's eyes, however, were pointed not at her but at her weapon.

"Why do you have a… a…."

"Baseball bat? Safety. Come in. I'll explain in a second."

Hesitantly, Philip nodded and walked in. The house smelled like lilacs. Theo closed and locked the door behind her.

"So, my father's out of town, and I'm not supposed to let anyone in, including you I assume, but I saw you and you looked distressed and you look like you've been crying and I miss you, Philip, I haven't seen you in a while and you could be a murderer or something dressed as Philip but…"

"I'm not a murderer. I brought proof, I guess. Here." He held out his ID card. It wasn't the most solid proof, but hopefully it would convince Theo just enough…

It did.

She threw her arms around him and he stumbled a little from the force but then was hugging her back, and it was so much better than being at home and so much better than seeing her with George and he wanted it to last forever but he had to breathe, so he let go.

"Well, then. This is… surprising. Let's go in the basement, I guess." Theo shrugged.

"Why?"

"It feels more private. I don't know. I like it."

"Alright then. If you say so."

She was right. In the basement, Philip felt safe. They sat on the couch and he told her everything and she listened, and it was silent except for the sound of their voices and the whir of the air conditioning. At about 8:00, he got a text from his mom.

 **From- Elizabeth Hamilton (Mom):** Philip where are you?

 **From- Elizabeth Hamilton (Mom):** Are you okay?

 **From- Elizabeth Hamilton (Mom):** What happened?

 **To- Eliza Hamilton (Mom):** im fine

 **To- Eliza Hamilton (Mom):** sorry

 **To- Eliza Hamilton (Mom):** im working on a school thing with Theo

 **To- Eliza Hamilton (Mom):** i meant to leave a note

 **To- Eliza Hamilton (Mom):** i just need to stay overnight

 **From- Elizabeth Hamilton (Mom):** We'll discuss this later. Next time call me. I'll pick you up at 10:00 tomorrow.

 **To- Eliza Hamilton (Mom):** cool thx

 **To- Eliza Hamilton (Mom):** i mean

 **To- Eliza Hamilton (Mom):** thank you mom 3

 **From- Elizabeth Hamilton (Mom):** I'll see you tomorrow. Don't think this conversation is over.

Philip looked up. "I can stay overnight, if that's okay?"

Theo shrugged. "Sure, I guess. It's getting late, so we should probably get ready for bed. We can sleep in my room. Do you have pajamas?"

"No, I didn't think I'd be out for over a few hours."

Theo's face morphed into an evil grin. "Well, you can borrow some of mine!"

"Um, no, it's okay-" Philip's face grew hot. "I'll just… sleep in these clothes-"

"Nope! I have the perfect pair for you!"

And that was how Philip Hamilton and Theodosia Burr ended up on the floor of Theo's grin, Philip wearing hot pink cat-themed pajamas and Theo wearing a camo-print onesie, both trying to forget that anything besides the other existed.

Theo fell asleep rather easily that night, leaving Philip awake in the dark. Nothing could comfort him. Nothing could distract him from thinking of his home. He needed to focus. He turned to Theodosia and tried to observe everything he could about her. Even in the dim light, her features were prominent: thick black curls draped over her pillow, slim build curled up on the rug, corners of her mouth barely turned up into a smile. Very lightly and cautiously, he touched her hair. _It's really beautiful_ , he thought. _Why have I never noticed before?_ She stirred a little in her sleep as he retracted his hand, but he did not turn back around to face the other way. Instead, he moved just a tiny bit closer to his best friend, and fell asleep in peace, his thoughts never nearing the life he would have to return to when he went home.


	9. A Conversation with Eliza

**Notes: Hi everyone! This chapter is sort of shorter than usual so sorry about that but I thought it was important. It's also Eliza-central, which will not be common but I'm trying it out I guess. Every time there is a perspective change mid-chapter, I will include a page break so that it's easier to follow those. In other news, thanks to all followers, favoriters, commenters, etc. You all rock and I love you. Enjoy!**

*****The next morning- the Burr household*****

When Eliza arrived at Theodosia's house the next morning, it was 8:14 in the morning. She rang the doorbell and waited, a pleasant smile on her face, until Theodosia anxiously opened the door several moments later.

"Hi Mrs. Hamilton," said the cheery 14-year-old, although Eliza heard a small quiver in her voice.

"Hello Theodosia. How are you and your father?"  
"Well, he's not around right now-" Theo visibly cringed at this, and Eliza assumed that she was worried that Eliza would blow up at her for having Philip over with no adults, she she kept her amiable expression to ease Theo's worries. "...but he's doing well, as am I. You're probably here for Philip…"

"Yes, could you get him? We really need to be getting home, his siblings miss him."

"Ok, Mrs. Hamilton. One second." As the girl scurried off, Eliza silently thanked the universe for giving Philip such a good friend as Theodosia. Not many people would take in their friend, knowing that they were risking so much anger from their parents about it. Not at this age, anyway. Eliza felt bad taking Philip away from her, but she needed to talk to him.

A moment later, Theo returned, holding hands with a scared-looking Philip, whose shoulders were slumped and whose head was down. Theo nervously nudged him, causing him to look up and face his mother. Upon meeting her eyes, he looked quickly down again. _He probably knows I'm upset with him,_ thought his mother. Eliza sighed. "Philip, let's say goodbye and thank you to Theodosia. We have to get home."

"Bye, Theo. Thanks," the boy mumbled.

"Bye Philip. It was nice to see you." Theo pulled him into a tight embrace, which Eliza noticed that he returned more than he had ever seemed to before. Odd.

"Theodosia, thank you so much for letting him stay here. It was so thoughtful of you. Goodbye, and tell your father we say 'hi', okay?"

Theo paled a bit at this idea, but nodded anyway. "Alright, bye Mrs. Hamilton!"

Eliza smiled one last time before pulling the door closed behind her and Philip.

Being parked around the corner from Theo's house, the Hamiltons had a short while to walk to get to the car. Halfway through, once Eliza determined they were out of sight and earshot of the Burr household, she turned to Philip. "Philip, what were you thinking? I was so scared!"

"Sorry, Mom." he half-whispered.

"No, we need to talk about this! You have to leave a note- or _something_ at least whenever you leave the house, we have discussed this-"

"Mom, can you let it go?" Philip tried to rush ahead, but Eliza grabbed his arm.

"Philip, you can't run off. I need to know if you're okay, if you got hurt…"

"Mom, let me go, I'm _fine_!"

"I understand that you didn't mean anything by it. But you should have told me! At least mentioned where you were going, I don't know, told me that you were going somewhere-"

"I couldn't tell you!"

"And why is that, young man?"

"Because you would have made me stay here and I can't stay here, not for that long, I can't stay here because someday you and Dad will stop just being silent and instead you'll fight, and I'm scared, Mom, I'm scared! Ok? Is that what you wanted to hear?" Philip was on the verge of tears now, all his emotions coming out as he pulled away from his mother's grip and tried to flee.

Eliza's face, so angry and frightened before, melted like candle wax into a pool of sorrow. Her grip on Philip's wrist loosened, but she slipped an arm behind his back, pulling him into a hug. He didn't resist, and his tears flowed freely onto her shirt. She lightly stroked his curly hair.

"Oh, sweetie," she whispered. Speaking normally again, she asked, "So this is about me and your father?"

Philip nodded ashamedly into Eliza's shirt.

"It's alright, honey. It's okay. We'll try to make it easier. We'll manage it, somehow. Just… please don't run off again. We both still love you, even if it doesn't seem like it all the time. Oh, Philip," she sighed, as he hugged her even tighter than before. "I love you, sweetie. You can talk to me. But I need to make sure you're safe. I don't want anything to happen to you. I love you."

Eyes red, Philip looked up. Eliza could see the lasting fear in his eyes, but more the sorrow that she now understood that he was going through. It pained her so much to see her baby like this, and all because of that stupid pamphlet. Another casualty lost to Alexander's selfishness. Their own son. She couldn't let anything else harm him, wouldn't allow it. It was too much for her, too much for him, too much for anyone to handle. Too much.

"I love you too, Mom."


	10. BURRTHDAY (aka oops this is long)

**Notes: So this is sort of a bonus chapter for Theodosia's BURRthday (which, if you didn't know, is June 21/the day that this is being uploaded), so it has some importance but is mostly fluffy (I think? I mean I attempted fluff so). Thank you to all commenters, favoriters, followers, and readers in general! You rock. Enjoy!**

*****June 21- the Burr household*****

"Philip!"  
"Theo!"

Per usual when Philip was greeted by Theodosia, he was engulfed in a warm embrace. When the two friends pulled away, they stood awkwardly beaming for a second until Philip broke the silence.

"Happy birthday," he breathed.

"Thanks. You sound… exhausted?"

"Yeah, I… walked here."

"You WHAT?"

"Look, I left a note for my mom, okay? I just didn't want to give her any more trouble than she already has."

"So things with them are the same?"

"I guess. I mean, I think it's getting a little better? Like, Dad doesn't sleep in the office anymore. He has a cot in their room. So... that's something?" He sighed. They hadn't gotten a chance to discuss Philip's family life in a while, as he had been avoiding the subject, especially around George. Theodosia, always understanding, never pried. "They just need time, Theo. I think they'll be okay eventually. They love each other, I can tell that they miss how it used to be."

"Oh, Philip," Theo murmured. Then her face suddenly brightened again. "Well, we're not here to dwell on _your_ sad reality. I believe it is _my_ birthday? I mean, you don't turn sixteen every day, now do you, Philip?" She was joking, and it made him happy. He could forget everything about home for a little, just to focus on Theo like he so often did.

"Of course, _Your Majesty_ , and here is my offering to you, my most gracious and generous queen." As he responded, he knelt down and began bowing while placing a red gift bag on the floor in front of him.

Theo giggled. "Come in, then," she said, picking up the bag and adding it to a pile of presents on the front table. Philip stood up and followed her, tentatively at first. Even though they saw each other nearly every day at school, he very rarely went over to Theo's house, on account of not wanting to disturb his parents. More importantly, even though their fathers had made peace about their children's' friendship so long ago, Alexander was on the edge and was extra likely to blow up at anyone. Philip and Theo decided it was for the best to keep him away from Burr, at least for a while. Hence, the house had become unfamiliar and foreign to Philip, not to mention the party decorations and recent remodels made it almost indiscernible from its everyday appearance anyway.

Philip wandered through crepe paper and balloons, trailing Theodosia. When they finally made it out of the hallway, they had entered what Philip vaguely recognized as the family room. Garlands were strewn across walls and the ceiling, a table was set up with food, and the rug was covered in sequins, which were quite pretty but Philip imagined would be difficult to clean up later. It was beautifully decorated room- so well done, in fact, that Philip almost didn't notice the other person sitting in the room.

"Joseph? Why are you…"

The boy got up. He was, as Philip correctly identified, Joseph Alston, who went to school with Theo, Philip, and George. Sweet kid, a bit annoying sometimes. _The Red One_ , Philip remembered, being hit with a wave of nostalgia as the silly third grade nickname came back to him. And then he remembered why Joseph had that nickname, and why he might be at the party without ever having been close friends with Theo before, and it all started to click…

"Hi, Philip. I don't know if you know this, but, well, I'm Theo's boyfriend now. I assume she told you…?" He trailed off as Philip shook his head.

"Um," Theo stepped farther into the room hesitantly. "I didn't tell you, Philip, because, I mean… we've only been dating for a few days, and it was after school was over… and I was worried you would be, I don't know, _upset_ or something and I know, it was a stupid move and-"

"No, it's fine. It's alright." Philip smiled. It was most certainly NOT alright, especially the part about how she didn't think to tell him about her new boyfriend, but it didn't mean he had to ruin the day. _Her_ day. And his, as well. _No use making the situation worse_ , he supposed.

Theo seemed relieved. "Well, then, if that's cleared up, does anyone- oh, hold up," She was cut off by the ring of the phone. "I'll be right back." With that, she danced out of the room, leaving Philip and Joseph alone together.

Philip semi-reluctantly tried to break the ice. "Um… well, long time, no see, I suppose?"

Joseph chuckled a bit. "I mean, school ended a week ago, but sure. Hey, uh, you and Theo have been friends for a long time, right?"

At this, Philip laughed sarcastically. "We've only been inseparable since we met in Kindergarten. Is that a long enough time for you?"

Joseph backed up a little and put his hands out in front of him. "Woah, chill dude, I don't want to impose on your friendship. I just want to know where I stand with you, try to prove to you that I won't hurt Theo. I can imagine why you'd be protective of her." He paused for a second, locking eyes with Philip, who stayed silent. "Your friend George heard about us the day after we started dating. I guess you could say that he didn't… approve. That's partially why she didn't tell you. Look, kid," he stepped closer to Philip again. "She still likes you. You're not being replaced. Okay?"

After a second, Philip smiled. His voice was only slightly strangled as he responded. "When did I ever say I thought I was being replaced?"

At that moment, Theodosia came back into the room. "That was George," she announced. "He says he can't come. So, that's too bad," she glanced at the two boys. Philip looked at Joseph, and could tell he felt the same was as Philip did: not exactly unhappy with the fact that George wasn't coming. "But oh well. Who's up for some games?

The next few hours were spent just goofing around. Theo won Scrabble, while Joseph discovered a hidden talent for charades. A good portion of the time was spent by Theo and Philip belting _Les Misérables_ songs at the top of their lungs while Joseph looked on rather uncomfortably. Philip didn't really care that Joseph felt left out as the only non-musical fan at the party, but Theo obviously felt bad for him, so they stopped their singing. Cake was eaten: Theo's favorite flavor was coconut, which neither of the boys really enjoyed, but Theo seemed to never get enough of it. After that was time for Theo to open her presents. Joseph gave her a beautiful golden necklace with her initials on it, and upon seeing it she leaned over and kissed him on the cheek before saying thanks. Philip's expression darkened a little at this, but nevertheless he proudly beamed when she opened his present: a can of "Zombie Repellent" that he had bought at a jokeshop. Her face lit up when she read what it was and she laughed and threw her arms around Philip, and all he could think was _isn't this just the best feeling in the world, to be hugged this closely by someone like her?_ so that when they pulled apart, he just sat with a little smile on his face for a few seconds, ignoring how close Joseph had moved next to Theo.

Theo, forever non-stop, jumped up and started towards the back door. "Who wants s'mores?"

Both boys, still sitting on the floor, stared blankly for a second, until Joseph eloquently expressed what both of them were feeling: " _Hell_ yes I want s'mores!" They scrambled after Theo, who was already on her way outside with a plate of graham crackers, chocolate bars, and marshmallows.

Once all three teenagers were on the back patio and the wood in the fire pit was aflame, they all rushed towards the supplies at the same time. Joseph stopped and signaled for Theo to get her materials first, causing her to blush furiously in the dark. Philip's anger started to return. He knew it was irrational, but thoughts riddled with annoyance at Joseph kept creeping into his mind- _How dare he act like he's been best friends with her forever? That's MY job, MINE, and_ maybe _George's. What gives him the right to treat her like he's her loyal and obedient servant, what gives him the right to act like he's better than me, what…_

Philip was pried out of his fuming thoughts by Joseph, who tapped him lightly on the shoulder and nodded for Philip to get his ingredients next, just like he had done with Theo. Suspicious and surprised but not about to argue, Philip stepped up to the little table with the materials on it. Maybe Joseph wasn't so bad. At the very least, Philip figured he should give him another chance- or, at least, attempt to.

And so on the night continued, Philip occasionally burning his marshmallows in the fire, Joseph getting chocolate all over his face, Theo squished in between the boys on the ground where they were sitting and eating, snuggling into Joseph but with her arm around Philip.

"Philip! Your mother!" Aaron Burr, who had been absent in his office all day to let the kids have some time on their own, called Philip from the front hall.

"Shoot, I have to go. Bye, Theo. Happy birthday," he said, hugging her lightly, which she returned with a more forceful embrace.

"Bye Philip! Thanks for coming and everything."

"See you soon, I hope."

"You too." They made eye contact one last time before Philip turned to Joseph, who had been standing a little behind them.

"See you around, Joseph!"

"Touché, Philip. See you at school." After Joseph waved, Philip began to walk up towards the house to leave.

"Philip, wait!"

He turned with alarm. "What, Theo?"

She giggled. "You have marshmallow in your hair."


	11. Eacker's Lament (aka oops this is short)

**Notes: Hello everyone. This chapter is insanely short. That is because I am A) very busy, B) coming up with a bunch of random ideas for oneshots and sometimes writing them, and C) suffering from Writer's Block for this part of the story. Maybe I'll get a chance to update again during the week, maybe I won't. You'll just have to wait and see. Comments, Favorites, and Follows are appreciated/loved as always. Enjoy.**

*****The same night- the Eacker household*****

A _boyfriend?_

How could Theodosia, George's life-long friend, whom he had known since their parents met at a daycare when Theo was less than one year old, who had always been by George's side, who had always been a tomboy, who had always been just Theo to him, have a _boyfriend?_

Needless to say, George was a little more than a little pissed off at Theodosia for several reasons.

One: she had gotten a boyfriend in the first place. George recognized that this was a stupid reason to be mad at Theo, since it was her right to be with whomever she wanted to, but it still annoyed him. He wasn't used to her having someone else, because before now, the only person he ever had to share her with was Philip. He didn't like that, either, but he had gotten used to it, and Theo seemed to care about them equally, and as friends. This was new. This was different.

Two: her boyfriend was Joseph Alston. It wasn't anything about Joseph in particular, George supposed. He was a pretty friendly guy, handsome, smart (although not as smart as Theo), and seemed like he would be a good boyfriend. But the problem was that Joseph barely knew Theo. How was it his right to act like they had been best friends for their whole lives, like he somehow had a special insight into her personality just because they had been going out for- what, a week now? Two? Whatever. It didn't matter. He didn't understand who she really was, and he never would, not like George did.

Three: she hadn't told George- or Philip- about the relationship until that day. When she finally did, George was not happy, and he told that to her. She accused him of "overreacting" and "never leaving her alone", when all he was trying to do was protect her! And, maybe, keep her to himself… but no. That wasn't important. She acted like she couldn't trust him. It wasn't fair.

Sighing, George curled up more under the blanket he was using. He was home alone, waiting for his parents to get back from the store. They would ask him how his day was, he would smile and tell them that it was fine. They would ask him how his friends were, and he would say that Theo was doing great and that Philip-

A sudden thought struck him. Had Theo told Philip? Had she told him before today, or had he just found out at Theo's party (which George had declined to go to, knowing that George would be there)? Another sigh. George didn't exactly like Philip- in fact, the boys detested each other a majority of the time- but maybe it would be nice to unite over a common enemy. Assuming, of course, that Philip disapproved of the relationship as much as George did. Talking to Philip probably wouldn't make George feel much better, but maybe it would relieve his loneliness for a bit. Squirming a bit in his blanket cocoon, he picked up his cell phone and began to dial.


	12. Bitter Phil

**Notes: AYYY Another way too short chapter! I don't really know what I'm doing with George so if you have an idea PLEASE let me know! Yay exclamation points! Comments, favorites, and follows appreciated! Enjoy!**

*****Immediately after the previous chapter*****

"Hi,"

"Hi…"

"Uh… who is this?"

George started. He had expected Philip to recognize his voice. Only then did it occur to George that, though having each other's numbers since they got phones, neither boy had ever called the other. "Hey… it's George."

"What do you want?" Philip was obviously indignant.

"This is Philip, right?"

"Yeah,"

"I wanted to talk to you about Theodosia."

"Theodosia? Why?" George winced a bit. There was a bitterness in Philip's tone that suggested he already knew what George was about to say.

"Did you hear about her… her…"

" _Boyfriend?_ " George could hear Philip's sarcastic sneer through the phone.

"So she told you?"

"Told me? I met him! He's alright- nice guy. She didn't bother letting me know about him before we both ended up in her living room today, though…"

Philip was obviously just as upset as George was, which surprised him. Normally, even though he and Philip were both close friends with Theo, George was the most protective of her, having known her longer. Not to say Philip didn't constantly battle for her attention when George was around, but from what Theo had told him, Philip was only like that when George was there. _Strange…_

Figuring he'd better wrap up the conversation soon so as not to aggravate Philip even more, George tried to sound as bitter as Philip did, attempting to make a common enemy of Joseph. "Yeah. It's frustrating. Look, I've gotta go, so…"

"Bye." It was cold and dismissive. There goes the "friends through a common enemy" idea.

"Bye, Philip."


	13. You and I Were Fireworks

**Notes: Since the last two chapters were super short (and the second was also late) I'm uploading two today! (This takes place in the same year as the previous ones, so just a month-ish later.) Happy July 4th, yay, etc. Comments, favorites, and follows loved. I still need help with George's character. Enjoy. Hurrah.**

*****July 4th- the King's High School field*****

Philip and George were sitting sulkily on a blanket together at 9:00 PM in the field of their high school. It was Independence Day, and the school's annual fireworks display was going to start any minute now. Theodosia, Philip, and George had come as a group, without even their parents, and had been having a great time eating hotdogs and drinking root beer until Theodosia had gone off to answer a call and never returned. Neither boy had spoken since Theodosia left, instead taking their places at opposite ends of their blanket to grumble about Theodosia never spending time with them anymore. She'd been gone for about ten minutes, and the boys could guess who the call had been from. Their assumptions were confirmed when they saw Theo and Joseph walking hand in hand towards them.

Philip saw them first. He looked up, startled, then plastered a fake smile to his face and stood up to greet Joseph.

"Joseph! I… didn't expect you here…" He attempted to seem happy with the surprise appearance, which was hard, considering Theo had specifically invited George and Philip so it could be a "close-group-of-friends-only-excluding-boyfriend" night.

"Yeah, hey, I was driving by and I decided to call Theo to see if she was gonna be here, and she said she was, so she came to pick me up! It's nice to be here with you guys," Joseph was easygoing as ever. It made Philip want to be that happy, that carefree, that perfect too. It was infuriating.

Theo stood by Joseph's side, giggling lightly. She showed no sign of regret or apology for leaving the boys or letting her boyfriend into what was supposed to be a strictly boyfriend-free picnic.

A burst of light behind them signaled that the fireworks would be starting any second. "Come on, Joe, let's sit down," Theo eagerly said. She pulled him down to the blanket, where he leaned onto her and she snuggled closer into his shoulder. Philip moved to sit down when he noticed George staring at him. Philip tilted his head a bit, trying to signal confusion, to which George responded with a sharp jerk of his head away from Theo and Joseph. Philip quietly moved towards where George was telling him where to go, but glancing once more at the couple. George shook his head. Speaking in a hushed tone, George clarified. "They won't notice us missing."

Sadly, Philip noticed, that was probably true. Theo and Joseph were whispering to each other and didn't seem to be paying much attention to the rest of the world. It was when they began to sloppily kiss that Philip turned away in disgust. "So why are we over here? Other than, I mean, not being over there with the _lovebirds_."

"I don't get it, Philip. You seem so, I don't know… bitter, I guess, on the phone and now, about Joseph, but then you talk to him like you're his best friend. What are you doing?"

This caught Philip off guard. He hadn't been expecting George to ask him something like that. He was about to pass it off as nothing, or reply with some snarky remark, when he decided that maybe this was an opportunity. If Theo wasn't going to be paying attention to him, maybe he should at least attempt to grow closer to George. Why not tell the truth, tell him why he was acting like this? Philip sighed. "I… I just want her to be happy. I can't say I'm glad that she's with… _him_ , but, he's not as bad as he could be. He's a nice guy. He's sweet. He's hard to hate, and he makes her happy. What else could we ask for?" He didn't expect George to understand, maybe to argue or disagree, but instead the other boy nodded.

"I guess we just have to deal with it. You have a point, he's nice. It's just… I feel like she doesn't want me anymore."

"Yeah."

A firework exploded in the sky above them, followed immediately by several more. The show was starting. After sharing one final glance, the boys headed back to the blanket and discreetly sat down next to Theo and Joseph. Theo turned and wrapped her arm around George and Philip, hugging them lightly while pressing a quick kiss to her boyfriend's cheek. Philip could feel George relax at Theo's touch, maybe glad that he was being openly appreciated by her. Philip relaxed some too, knowing that although his friend group was on the brink of falling apart, it hadn't disintegrated yet. Maybe it was even getting stronger. Maybe it was getting weaker. It was hard to tell, but whatever it was, Philip was content. For now.


	14. Yorktown Coffee

**Notes: Haha this is really late sorry guys**

 **I'm really happy with this chapter though**

 **Comments, Faves and Follows loved as always (thank you everyone!)**

 **I don't own Hamilton, Honda, or Queen's Theatre.**

 **Enjoy!**

As the year continued, Philip tried. He did. He tried really, really hard to be happy for Theo and her boyfriend. It shouldn't have been difficult. He stood by what he had told George: Joseph made Theo happy, so he had to be accepted, if not liked, by the boys. Besides, Joseph was charmer and really seemed to love Theodosia. But Philip just couldn't seem to get rid of the little voice in his head that told him that it wasn't fair how much attention Theo was giving Joseph and how little she was giving Philip. To be honest, Philip felt forgotten. He stayed home more often, having no invitations from Theodosia (and certainly not George) to go somewhere. Thankfully his parents, though not fully reconciled, had returned to more of a normal family dynamic, making the household less tense. Philip was also glad that as his siblings grew up, he didn't have to devote as much of his time to taking care of them, leaving him with free time. He mostly spent this free time sitting alone in his room, writing or doing homework.

What a fun life.

It was early October when Philip went on his first real "outing" since Theo and Joseph had gotten together. He was sitting in his room per usual when someone knocked on his door.

"Philip?"

"Who IS it?"

"Philip, you know exactly who it is."

Philip sighed. Of course he knew. His father rarely stopped talking. How could Philip forget his voice?

"Come in."

The door swung open violently to reveal Alexander Hamilton, nervously drumming his fingers on his leg but happier looking than Philip had seen him in a long time.

"Philip, I have a surprise for you!"

Philip couldn't pretend he wasn't intrigued, but knowing his father, the "surprise" would be something like a piece of news about the construction of some outrageous political monument that Alexander thought Philip would enjoy. Nevertheless, there was always a chance it would be something good.

"What is it?"

"Not _what_ , Philip, but _who_. D'you remember my old friend John Laurens?"

"Wasn't he the one who got shot when he defied his orders in the military and tried to carry out a reckless mission?"

Alexander saddened briefly, and Philip suddenly wondered if he'd said too much. But as his father continued, his face lit up again.

"Yes, that's the one. Terribly sad. But let's not dwell on the past! His wife, Martha, she's been living in London since he died with their daughter- who would be twenty-two now, I'm pretty sure- and Frances- that's the daughter- has come to America for a week, and she's _dying_ to meet you! So I told her that you would meet her at that coffee shop, Yorktown or whatever it's called, today at 4:00! How does that sound? She seems just _charming_ from what I've heard. So what do you think?" Alexander spoke at his usual breakneck speed, making it hard for Philip to follow what he was proposing, so the boy just nodded meekly. "Great!" The man continued. "You should probably get going, then. I printed out the directions for you already if you wanted to drive yourself…"

As his father kept talking, Philip panicked. Get going? Directions? Driving? What had he agreed to? He left his room, grabbed the keys to his beat up Honda (he had just gotten his license last month!) along with the printed directions and slipped out of the house.

* * *

Once Philip pulled up at Yorktown Coffee, he still didn't know why he was there. He assumed he was meeting someone- why else would he be on his own at a coffee shop in the middle of the afternoon- but who, and why? He was still asking himself these questions as he walked in. The shop was crowded with people, but by far the most noticeable was a girl, probably in her twenties or upper teens, sitting alone at the farthest back table. She wore modest clothes that sharply contrasted with the eyebrow piercing she had, with her outfit including two very tall ugg-style boots: one pink and one green, The most striking thing about her, though, was her hair. It was in a feathery style, about shoulder length, and bright, bright orange. Philip couldn't draw his eyes away.

In fact, he didn't realize how long he'd been staring at her until she looked up, saw him, and her eyes lit up with recognition. Philip tried to quickly look away. Who was she? Why, why was he staring? He knew better than to stare! He briefly considered making a run for it and leaving the shop like he'd come in by accident, but the young woman was walking towards him now, smiling. There was no easy way out.

"Hi! You must be Philip," she said, a British accent tinging her voice. She reached out to shake the nervous and now confused boy. Was this who he was supposed to meet? Probably. "I'm Frances Laurens, your father said you would meet me here…?"

Philip's face grew hot. "Yeah, well, I think he… he was talking to me but… y'know, he was… I wasn't really…"

"Paying attention?" She finished with a grin as he nodded. "Yeah, it's cool, I get it. So, _Philip Hamilton_ … how are you doing?"

Philip smiled a bit. It was nice talking to this girl, whose name was apparently Frances. She felt like his cousin, which he supposed made sense, her being the daughter of one of his father's best friends. As they talked, he learned a lot about her: she was twenty-two, artsy, outgoing, and worked part-time at the Queen's Theatre, back in London. She had a girlfriend named Kendra who she was planning to propose to soon but wasn't sure how to. Philip told her that he didn't have any good advice on that front, which seemed to intrigue her.

"So," Frances said, said, setting down the frappuccino she'd bought for herself. "Is there any special person _you've_ got your eye on?"

Philip's first thought was of Theodosia, but he pushed that back. _I'm trying to relax here. I can't jump to her relationship at any mention of people dating._ "No, I… no, not really."

Frances' eyes twinkled. "Come on, mate, there's gotta be someone! Well," she stopped herself. "Not necessarily. You're allowed to be aro, or just not interested in anyone at the moment. But you're blushing, and I'm betting that means you thought of someone when I said 'special person'..."

"Shut up!" _Curse my stupid blush_ , he thought, but he couldn't stop more heat from rising to his face.

"I'm right, aren't I?"

"No! Well, I did think of someone, but it doesn't mean I _like_ her!"

"And who, pray tell, is it?"

"Theodosia Burr," he mumbled.

Frances seemed to recognize the name. "Aaron Burr's daughter?"

"Yeah…"

"Oh, that's great! I've heard she's charming. You two would be great together!"

"I said, I don't have a crush on her! I guess I just thought of her because she has a new boyfriend."

"Aww, is ickle Philly jealous?"

"No! Be quiet! I'm just… I feel left out, okay? Like she never pays attention to me any more. I'm not jealous because I like her."

Frances held up her hands in mock innocence. "Look, if that's what you want to believe, then believe it. I'm not going to stop you. But, because I can tell that you _do_ like her-"

"I don't."

"-I'm going to give you some advice. Try to let her live. You're what, 17? And she's even younger, right? The relationship probably won't last. Don't sabotage it, support her, and when they break up which they probably will, be the first to comfort her. We can't all end up with perfect fairy tales, but we can try. Okay?"

Philip could sense that there was no way he could get out of this conversation without agreeing. "Fine," he grumbled, accompanied with an eye roll for good measure.

"Good. But, if this guy she's dating ends up being a real prick, then," she leaned in close to whisper in Philip's ear. "Well, let's just say murder is not out of the question." At this, Philip laughed, and Frances sat back up in her seat. He didn't like Theo, not like that, no. No, definitely not. But he supposed what Frances had said could apply to getting his friend back and things becoming normal again. He would give it a shot.


	15. In Actuality

**Notes: Gah I'm sorry it's been like a thousand years everyone- it's summer, and I've been busy, and also I'm still suffering from writer's block. Getting closer to the climax though, so that's exciting! I owe the format of this chapter to TJeffs on Ao3 in their fic** _ **Priceless**_ **, so thank you to them. Speaking of Ao3, I have one, it's Huffleclaw_Hamilfan, and it's not worth checking out. It's currently just the beginning of this story, and will probably eventually just be the same as what I put on here. So yeah. Enjoy, and comments/favorites/follows are loved as always!**

By all rights, Theo was supposed to be happy dating Joseph. In fact, she was happy. He was sweet as ever, constantly showering her with affection. On special occasions, they often got together to go have a picnic, or sit on the back of Joseph's car to watch the sun set. A lot of their time was spent at the other's house, usually to watch a movie or play video games together. Theo's father approved of his daughter dating Joseph, and encouraged the two to hang out as much as they wanted. Theo knew he thought Joseph was a good influence on her. Even Philip and George seemed to be coming to peace with Theo's relationship, although things were not the same as they used to be among the three friends. Otherwise, all was well.

Or so it seemed. All is rarely well in actuality.

* * *

 _He was sweet as ever, constantly showering her with affection._

* * *

"Hey, Theodosia!" An eager Joseph ran up to Theo and started to kiss her avidly on the lips before she could respond. When he pulled away, she chuckled, a bit awkwardly. Having grown up being the friend who always hugged nearly everyone she could, she found it surprising when Joseph's PDA didn't quite strike a tone with her. She pushed it aside. She'd always loved his hugs and kisses. Hadn't she?

* * *

 _On special occasions, they often got together to go have a picnic, or sit on the back of Joseph's car to watch the sun set._

* * *

They were laying on a picnic blanket outside in the chilly November air. Their hands brushed, causing Joseph to grab hers tightly in his own. She didn't smile. She barely even noticed. Her thoughts were elsewhere, floating through the void, occasionally landing on Philip or George. Never on Joseph. Even once she had drifted off to sleep, her dreams never mentioned her boyfriend. It was, surprisingly, bliss, to forget.

* * *

 _A lot of their time was spent at the other's house, usually to watch a movie or play video games together._

* * *

"You can pick the movie, Theo. Unless you'd rather play some game, that is…?"

"No, it's okay. How about you pick this time?"

"But I want to make sure you get the one you want!"

"I always pick. It's alright. You can choose."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes! I'm sure. Okay?"

"...Fine…"

Yes, it was endearing that Joseph never wanted her to be dissatisfied with the movie or game or whatever they did. Yes, it was sweet that he always let her choose. But it bugged her. And it bugged her that it bugged her, because she shouldn't have gotten upset at something so nice that he was doing for her. Theodosia was just so sick of it. Just so done.

* * *

 _Theo's father approved of his daughter dating Joseph, and encouraged the two to hang out as much as they wanted. Theo knew he thought Joseph was a good influence on her._

* * *

"Theo, I'm going to work now. You and Joseph be safe, okay? Don't use the oven while I'm gone! Remember what happened last time?" Aaron Burr shouted as he went out the door.

"'Kay Dad!" Theo yelled back, standing with Joseph in the kitchen. As soon as the door closed, she turned to her boyfriend and grinned. "So… do you want to make cookies, or what?"

"I thought your dad said not to use the oven?"

"Yeah, but what's life without a few risks? Besides, you can supervise. He just doesn't trust me because when I was ten I accidentally lit a cake on fire. It's not a big deal! I know you like to bake!"

"Well, yeah, I do, but we should listen to your dad. I don't want you to get in trouble because of me!"

"Fine…" Theo grumbled. She knew Joseph was right, and that he was just trying to take care of her. But she'd never liked when other people told her what to do. She'd never liked being held back when she could be doing something more, either. Joseph was doing both here. Maybe it would've been endearing if someone else did it, but Theo couldn't feel anything except annoyance when he did. The rest of the day was spent in almost complete silence as they marathoned _Sherlock_ on the living room couch, sitting almost a foot away from each other.

* * *

 _Even Philip and George seemed to be coming to peace with Theo's relationship, although things were not the same as they used to be among the three friends._

* * *

No. No, "peace" wasn't why Philip and George no longer seemed to be arguing with Theo or Joseph or each other, or why they didn't protest the relationship anymore. Theo could see the real reasons why. George was obviously resigned. He was never looking anywhere near Theo, Joseph, or Philip, but rather staring off into the distance. He had started to talk a lot to the new boy at school, Jacob, but never to Theodosia if he could help it. She hated seeing George, her friend since they met at daycare when she was less than one and he was two, having given up on their friendship because of a relationship with someone she'd only been dating for a few months. It stung more sharply than she'd ever expected it to sting.

Philip was different. He was NOT resigned, NOT giving up, and still NOT okay with Theo dating Joseph. The only change was that he seemed to not want to upset Theo, so instead stopped hanging out with her and Joseph altogether. Primarily, she would spot him walking around town with his sister Angie, now a sophomore. Their conversations usually consisted of Philip yelling, ranting angrily, and Angie trying to calm him down. God, she missed hanging out with him. Someone who, though often insecure and sometimes shy, had a flaming personality when passionate. Who could show care by giving freedom instead of giving protection from minor things. Who learned from his mistakes when he made them, and who knew it was okay to make mistakes.

Joseph was kind, caring, and sweet. He loved Theodosia and truly wanted her to have a long, safe life. But the sacrifices she had to make to keep their relationship happy- her adventurous personality, independence, and want to take minor risks, as well as the connections with her two closest friends, the people she loved most outside of her family- were too much. So something had to change.

* * *

 _Otherwise, all was well. Or so it seemed. All is rarely well in actuality._

* * *

*****December 12- the Alston household*****

"Theo, are you okay?"

She was standing in the doorway, just out of the cold wind, with the closed door touching the back of her winter jacket. Her breath caught. "Joseph, I think something needs to change."

"What… do you mean?" Joseph's tentative tone showed that he probably already knew what she meant.

"It's just… I feel… I don't know, _trapped_ , I guess. It's not your fault, you're just being nice, it's… um… well…" It was harder to cut ties than she'd anticipated. It was all she could do not to burst into tears, but what good would crying do? A lot of the reason she was trying to break up with Joseph was because she needed to be more independent. Shouldn't that mean that she also had to be strong? No. No time for this right now. Theodosia pushed those thoughts out of her mind, out of the way, and continued. "I'm sorry, Joseph, I know I seem… _weak_ , and I know you're just being you, but… I can't live with it. I'm sorry." She buried her head in her hands.

"It's okay, Theo."

She looked up, surprised. She had expected to see Joseph upset, or worse, mad. Instead, he looked sad, but accepting. Pained, but almost relieved.

Joseph went on, his eyes sagging with sadness but obviously attempting to sound okay. "I, well… I still love you, and I don't really understand why you want to break up, but I'm sure you have good… good reasons. I get it if you want to split up but, maybe you'd be willing to give it one more shot…?" He trailed off, hopeful, but Theo shook her head.

"I'm sorry, but no. It's… you would have to change who you were to make things work, and I don't want you to have to do that. I…" She could no longer stop the tears. Silently cursing herself, she wiped them away, only to feel Joseph wrap his arms around her.

"Hey," he said, smiling down at her.

"Hey." A slight smile.

"I get it, okay? Not everything works out. And don't feel guilty about me being sad, either. Some things aren't meant to be."

"Thanks," she mumbled into Joseph's arm.

"One more thing, though- are we, on, like, good terms? As friends?"

Theodosia looked up. "Yeah, but I would like some… space, I guess. Philip, and George too, I feel like I've lost them. I just need some time to let them back in, but yeah, we're still good. If that's okay, I mean."

"Of course, Theo. Of course it is."

The rest of the night was spent in Joseph's room playing Scrabble, and it wasn't the same as their previous visits. At least, not for Theodosia. She felt more free, more able to breathe, less committed, and more hopeful. It was like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. Sure she still had to figure out how to start letting Philip and George back in again, and despite Joseph's consolations she still felt bad for breaking his heart. But things were looking up, and for the first time in a long while, Theo wasn't just content. She was actually looking forward to what the next day would bring.


	16. Coffee and Mistakes

**Notes: GAH SUE ME I KNOW HOW LATE THIS IS AHHH I'M SO SORRY DON'T HURT ME**

 **...anyways...**

 **Yeah, sorry this has been so late! Truth is, I'm always either busy or tired now that school's started, so it's getting harder to be on schedule. BUT I am still motivated for this story (thank goodness) and though I'm having trouble writing some of the romance (tips? please? I need your help), I'm getting very excited for the upcoming chapters. I haven't said that I don't own Hamilton in a while, but I don't own Hamilton. Also, comments, follows, and favorites always appreciated! Thanks to everyone who has already done stuff like that. Without further ado, this long overdue chapter.**

 **(Also if anyone wants to scream about Something Rotten! or School of Rock the Musical in the comments I will be more than happy to respond, I just saw both of them on Broadway!)**

*****The next day- Yorktown Coffee*****

"He did WHAT?!"

"Broke up. _We_ broke up."

"He broke up with you."

"No, _we_ broke up with each _other_."

"Wow. I just can't believe he broke up with you."

"Philip-"

Philip flashed Theo a grin from across the table. She smirked back. _What a cheeky little bastard that boy is._ The newly-reunited friends were sitting in Yorktown Coffee instead of at school, as it had snowed the previous night. It was only about three inches, but it was enough to cancel their school, so Theo had invited Philip and George to meet her at the coffee shop. George, to Theo's dismay, gave some excuse about having to hang out with his cousin. While Theo definitely felt the loss, it wasn't as much as she'd thought it would be. In fact, having Philip there seemed like enough. And, for once, George and Philip weren't at each other's throats, which made it easier to have a good time.

There was a bit of silence over the Christmas-themed drinks they had bought. It was nice, to have everything be done. No more Joseph to worry about. But it was obvious to Theo that George hadn't forgiven her for neglecting him at all. What the heck did she have to do to get him to be his old self again? She missed the old George. She-

"Theo? You okay?" Philip's voice cut into her thoughts, bringing her back to reality.

"Yeah, I'm… I'm alright." She mumbled.

"Is this about George?" Philip probed, looking uncertain and a bit awkward.

Theo sighed, and looked down. She leaned in her head towards him, and he did the same. Their faces were inches apart. "Yeah, Phil. Yeah, it's about George. I mean, I'm really glad to be hanging out with you again. Don't get me wrong, But, George and I have been friends since we were, y'know, in diapers. Before kindergarten, even. Before I met you. And, well, I don't think he's ever had to be alone before. I'm always the one he's told things to, he doesn't have anyone else to confide in- he has family problems, his sister, well, she's… it's a long story- but I've _always_ been there. And then I go and leave him- both of you- while I'm dating Joseph, and I'm not sure what to do now, because I've ruined everything and things with his sister are getting worse but he just won't open up-"

"Am I interrupting something?"

Theo and Philip looked up to see George, standing next to the table, looking furious but with glistening eyes.

"George-" Theo stood up, putting on a smile, and moving towards him. "George, I'm so glad to see you! I'm so sorry-"

"Sorry about what? The fact that you just went and _abandoned_ me for a few months? Or because you just told _him_ about- you know, about- _her_."

"George, I don't-"

"You said you wouldn't talk about it! Not to anyone else, especially not to him!" George roared. The few other customers and staff in the shop had turned to look, but none dared to intervene.

"Look, George, I'm sorry, I just-"

"You just _what?_ "

Theo met his eyes. Hers were apologetic, innocent, regretful. His were livid, save the one tear that rolled free down his cheek. After a second she hung her head. She knew Philip must be confused, must be shocked. After all, he was never this quiet when he or Theo was confronted. She turned to look at where he was- sure enough, he was half-standing at the table, eyes and mouth wide- and then, looking back at George, realized that she'd just made a huge mistake. George didn't yell. In fact, he looked… calm. But calm in the sense that his anger had boiled so hot that it stopped overflowing. He was no longer crying. When he spoke again, it was with a whisper.

"Fine, then," was all he said. And George turned on his heel and walked out, leaving Theo tearing up and Philip speechless as ever.

Chatter slowly began to start up again in the cafe, but not between the two friends.

Philip was the first to break their silence. "Wow. I mean, I knew he was a dick, but not _that_ much of a dick, am I right, Theo? Theo? Are you…" Theo felt Philip put a hand on her shoulder, which she gently shook off. "Theodosia?"

"It's all my fault" was all she could manage to say.

"Theo," Philip comforted, replacing his hand on her shoulder and nudging her towards him. She turned a bit, still not looking up. "It's not. It's…" But he didn't have an answer. She knew it was her fault. She knew it.

Her face was wet with tears when she looked up at Philip again. Awkwardly, he pulled her into an embrace, which she didn't fight. Slowly, Theo closed her eyes, and felt Philip's arms around her, and…

...drifted off to sleep…

...and woke up on Philip's couch. Hazily, she looked around the room. The clock read, to her surprise, 11:32 PM, almost nine hours after the argument at Yorktown Coffee had happened. Oh… right. The argument. Theo winced at the returning memories. _Why did I do that, why did I tell Philip about Gertrude, why couldn't I have just kept my mouth shut? How did I get here?_ How _did_ she get here? Looking around more, she noticed Philip asleep on the chair next to the sofa, drooling and draped over the seat like a stereotypical teenage boy. She giggled a bit at the image, then realized that Philip probably carried her to the house- or, at least, got her there somehow. Her heart swelled with gratitude.

Suddenly Theodosia heard the sound of a keyboard clacking. At first, she was alarmed, but then realized that it was probably Philip's dad. He always seemed to be up late working on one thing or another, usually for his government job but often for his blog too. It made Theo tired just thinking about it, which is when she remembered that it was nearing midnight. It was a long day, and she wasn't non-stop like Mr. Hamilton was. She would deal with the consequences in the morning, hopefully with Philip by her side.


	17. Rewind

**Notes: WhAT?/?/? tWO ChaPteRs iN ONe dAy?/?/? WHat Is thIS MAdnESs?/?/?/?**

 **I figured I should get some stuff done. Reviews, favorites, follows appreciated. Love you all. Enjoy.**

*****The same day, earlier*****

He was hugging her, and he'd never felt more awkward or out of place.

Something had just gone horribly wrong. Theo was telling him something, something that had seemed really trivial but apparently wasn't, because then there was George, who was _always_ there just in time to mess things up, and he was upset and he yelled and Theo was crushed and Philip had never hated George more than in that moment.

It wasn't the incident itself that made him angry, but the fact that George had made Theo feel like it was her fault, whatever had happened. Sure, it sort of _was_ , but that didn't give George the right to shove it in her face like that! Whatever their personal argument was, whatever was going on with George's sister- Philip couldn't pretend he didn't want to know, but he didn't figure he should ask anytime soon- was _their_ deal. Nothing made making Theo feel like this okay. Nothing.

That was how they'd ended up here, him with his arms around her and her leaning against him. George had left, and most of the people in the coffee shop had stopped staring. They stood still in that embrace for at least a minute before Philip noticed that Theo had fallen asleep.

Great.

He couldn't help but admit that it was quite cute to see her long black curls messed up from being pushed against his chest, or the way she sniffed in her sleep every now and then. But having Theodosia asleep against him, while he was about thirty miles away from home, without a car? That meant he had to somehow get her to a house without waking her up. Actually, he considered waking her up. That would be much easier, but it just didn't seem right. She'd had a long day, a hard day, her boyfriend had broken up with her the day before… she deserved some rest. Admittedly, Philip also didn't want to wake her up on the chance that she wouldn't want to see him or be around him after what happened. But that wasn't the main reason. Definitely not.

Sighing, Philip picked Theo up bridal style and began to formulate a plan. He could take the bus to the stop nearest to his house, walk home, call Aaron Burr and tell him that Theo was staying over- no doubt he wouldn't approve, but he'd most likely let it happen- and hope for the best. It was weird, and Theo might wake up and hate him for carrying her around, but what else could he do? Not much. This plan would have to work, because Philip didn't have anything else.

He could feel a few lingering stares on his back as he left the coffee shop, carrying Theo in his arms. As he walked down the street, he received quite a few odd stares, which he tried to ignore. He just hoped it didn't look like he had murdered someone and was finding a place to hide the body.

The bus stop wasn't very far from Yorktown Coffee, and the bus driver didn't seem too bothered by the fact the Philip was carrying a sixteen-year-old unconscious girl onto the bus. Philip suspected she'd seen stranger things in her career than what she saw then. She did, however, charge Philip for two people rather than just one, which was slightly annoying.

As he slid into the uncomfortable bus seats and tried to lay Theo down so she could remain asleep, the girl stirred. Philip jumped back a bit, but Theo didn't wake up. He settled back in. He had the strangest urge to run his fingers through her hair, to caress her more than just the friendly hug he'd provided in the shop, to kiss her…

No. No no no no no. He had to push those feelings back. They kept nagging him, day after day, and as much as Philip adored having Theo as a friend, he _really didn't need_ to fall in love with her. Not now, anyway, right after everything started going badly, although Philip sometimes suspected that he'd felt like this about her for a long time- nope. He didn't like her _like that_ , never had, never would, no!

Yet he remembered what Frances had told him when they'd met in the coffee shop, remembered all the little times he just wanted to be a bit closer to Theo, remembered all the jealousy that he'd passed off as friendship while Theo was dating Joseph…

NO! No. There was some other explanation. He couldn't fall for Theo. He wasn't even sure if he _was_ falling for Theo. That's right, it's just friendship. Only friends. Only friends. Only-

A muffled announcement came from the bus speakers and, looking out the window, Philip realized it was their stop. He got up, pulling Theo back into his arms as gently as he could, and exited the bus, nodding in what he hoped was a pleasant manner at the bus driver.

It was only a block or so from that point until the Hamilton household, which didn't seem like a long distance, but had Philip struggling the whole way. Turns out carrying bodies is harder than it seems- or maybe Philip was just weak. _That's what Theo would say, as a joke,_ he thought to himself, smiling a bit. But then his thoughts drifted back to the internal argument from the bus, and he busied himself with writing a poem in his head about the weird grey-blue color of the sky. The distraction worked surprisingly well, and not long after, Philip found himself at his front step.

It was awkward trying to open the door without hurting Theo in any way, so Philip was hugely thankful when his dad opened the door from inside with a quizzical look.

"Philip…?"

"Hey Dad, it's a long story."

"Is that…"

"It's Theo. Can we crash here?"

"Philip…"

"It's my house too, Dad. I mean it. Let me and Theo in."

His father's slightly disapproving and mostly confused stare followed Philip into the living room, where he set Theo down on the couch. She snuggled up a bit in her sleep. _Cute_.

Philip turned to face his father. "She's alright, just asleep. Sorry about…"

Alexander looked a bit flushed. "No, it's fine. I'm just confused. You and her, are you… a thing?"

"What, Dad, no! We're friends. You know that." Now Philip was really blushing, and he expected his dad could tell. Thankfully, for once, Alexander kept his mouth shut. Philip thanked whatever god there was for this, because he knew how loud and interrogative Alexander could be, and he really didn't want to stay on this subject.

"I'll help you find some blankets." Philip's father finished, turning away. The house was quiet and dark other than the events in the living room, which was odd, even after the Reynolds Pamphlet crisis. Only then did Philip notice that it was 9:24. They had left the coffee shop at around 3:30, if he remembered right. He must have drifted off when he was on the bus… that explained why the sky was so different when he got off, and why it was oddly dark. Eliza usually went to bed at the same time as the kids- 9:00, because the kids needed sleep and because she was a morning person- so it made sense that Alexander was the only one up. He rarely slept, it seemed. But that meant he spent several _hours_ on that bus. Maybe he fell asleep, or… what? And Theo must have been really tired if she had slept through the whole trip. What… what was going on? How…

A yawn stifled Philip's ability to think clearly. It had been a long day for him, too, he supposed. In fact, he was starting to fall asleep standing up when his dad came back in with several blankets and two pillows.

"Why two?" Philip asked, his voice dripping with sleep.

"For you, Phil. I figured you would want to sleep out here."

"Thanks, Dad."

It didn't take much more than sitting down for Philip to fall asleep. Anything important could be dealt with the next day. Now, he and Theo just needed to rest.

A whole day spent thinking about Theodosia in various contexts, and not a minute wasted.


	18. A Small Series of Chapter-ettes

**Notes: Hey guys! Look, a chapter!**

 **This one's sort of a series of little chapter-ettes. We're getting nearer to prom. And we're getting nearer to the summer before college (! My babies are all grown up!). And we're getting nearer to... Philip's nineteenth birthday. And to Philip being nineteen. Muah ha ha...**

 **-I'm very excited please enjoy this chapter leave reviews and stuff I love you byeeeee-**

"Philip?"

"Wha- huh?!"

Philip fell out of the chair.

It was actually quite funny from Theodosia's point of view, but by Philip's vivid blush, she guessed it was less funny for him. Or maybe the redness was from the embarrassment, thinking that Theo had just woken up in his living room with no idea how she got there. She smiled.

"I, uh… I… carried you here. From Yorktown."

"I assumed."

"Yeah"

"Yeah."

They sat in silence for a bit, until Philip finally broke it.

"Do we have to… discuss what happened? Like, figure out what to do? I mean, it all felt so drastic yesterday, but… it's not like we have to make some sort of grand plan now, do we?"

After all that had happened with George? After the fights that had happened in the past, the tension between Theo's two best friends? After Theo had, admittedly accidentally, betrayed one of those friends in a small way that made a big impact, and possibly dug herself into a hole she couldn't get out of?

"No," she said carefully. "No, I don't think we do."

* * *

Philip was taking a test, but instead of pre-calculus facts running through his head, all he could hear was _Theodosia. Theodosia. Theodosia._ pounding in his brain. It was getting harder and harder to ignore the obvious attraction- no, no. _Platonic obsession_ with his friend. He slammed his pencil down a little too harshly on the desk, making a loud sound. _Dammit. What am I going to do?_

He would notice himself drifting off in the middle of conversations or classes, thinking of her. Nothing in particular about her, just… _her._ The way her hips swayed when she walked with confidence, the way her hazel eyes shimmered whenever she got passionate about something, the way her black curls cascaded down her back, the way she took most things in stride but wasn't afraid to admit that she had insecurities… everything.

Everything.

* * *

Theodosia was confused. She hated being confused. She hated the feeling of not only being out of control, but of having no way to understand what was going on. She hated it, hated it, hated it.

This was even harder, because she was confused about Philip Hamilton.

It wasn't like he was constantly in her head- at least, not in that way. He was a pretty big part of most of what happened to her outside of her personal life, though, so he was definitely there. But no, it was more like she desperately wanted to be around him, wanted to be next to him, wanted to have him next to her forever. Friendship? Maybe. Maybe not. But maybe. Ugh, what was going on?!

But it wasn't a big problem. No, no. She'd had bigger crushes than what this might be in her life, and she'd gotten through them. It wasn't a huge deal. She'd live.

Of course it didn't help that Philip was everywhere in her life, and the more she was with him, the less she wanted to leave.

* * *

The prom posters started going up on December 17, the Monday before winter break. They were there every year, and Philip had always noticed them, but this year, they brought about a different feel. It was senior year, after all, and prom was no longer something merely acknowledged by Philip and his classmates, but was something that left them with a feeling of… excitement? Fear? Dread? To be perfectly honest, Philip had never thought he'd go to prom, but since the posters had been put up, he'd found it strangely appealing. He'd go alone, of course. The only person he'd ever consider asking would never say yes…

And yes, he had finally admitted to himself, that maybe, just a little, he sort of, kind of, mayyyyyyyyybe liked Theodosia. A bit.

But that would never work. And it'd be awkward enough to even bring up prom around her. He tried a few times, but always chickened out.

"Hey, Theo?" He would say.

"Yeah, Phil?"

"I saw this really cool poster in the hallway today…"

"Ooh, which one?"

"The, uh… one for the school play. I really liked the way they painted Cosette's face…"

Needless to say, there was no way he had a chance.

* * *

Theo had always wanted to go to prom, and she'd always wondered whether or not she'd go with a date. She didn't really have a problem going on her own, as long as she had friends there, but Philip was sort of her only friend right now, and to be there with him? Who she wasn't really sure what her feelings for were? At all? That seemed weird, and wrong.

It'd be easier to go with a date…

No, it wouldn't. Would it? No, probably not.

But she would go. She decided then and there that she would go. She would get a fancy dress, get her hair done, do all the prom-prep stuff that she'd seen senior girls do. She would find out which of her friends were going- she didn't know whether to hope Philip was going or not- and she would hang out with them. Maybe she would go to the afterparty, which was almost definitely against her father's rules, but oh well. She would… figure it out?

 _ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh_

Theodosia fell face first onto her bed. As if life and drama weren't crazy enough, prom has to come in just as her whole friend group- and possible love interests- are just as insane. And there was still the George problem to deal with...

* * *

George was sitting on a brick wall with Anna Finck. They were holding hands. It was peaceful- the moon was up, and full, and bright. Anna was asleep, head on George's shoulder. It made him happy to be with Anna. What he had liked in Theodosia as a friend, he found in her, but so much more. While both were talkative, bright, and chipper, Anna also possessed a seriousness that Theodosia had always found hard to capture. While both were excitable, bouncy, and kind, Anna also had a certain generosity to her that Theo had never quite been able to adopt. Anna was a great friend, of course, but even more than that, she was an excellent girlfriend. Never in the roughly thirteen years that he and Theo had known each other had he ever liked her in _that_ way. Anna was different. Every time he saw her, she seemed to blossom. Petite, blonde, and beautiful on the outside. Sweet, trusting, and brilliant on the inside. Everything George had ever wanted in a friend or in a partner.

Except…

Maybe it was just because of the sheer length of time that he'd known Theodosia, but he trusted her with everything. _Everything_. The most private parts of his life were shared with her. Not just the traditional secrets- who likes who, opinions of other kids, et cetera- but also things about his own life. Things about his sister.

His sister, the alcoholic. His sister, with her dangerous liver disease. His sister, who'd walked out on the family seven years ago and yet never seemed to have truly left. His sister, whose leaving had sparked the arguments between his parents, which caused the divorce. His sister, who was probably dead but had left no means of contact for anyone to check with. Ella was the biggest rift in George's life, the cause of all the biggest problems, and yet he'd never felt afraid to tell Theodosia everything. They'd always had that special connection, and she'd never broken it. Until that day at Yorktown Coffee. That had hurt him, hurt him badly. When he heard the conversation, he could feel the spear of her words poking at his heart. When everything had gone downhill from there, he felt the point rupture it.

Yet, he hadn't stopped wondering if he maybe was overreacting. On one hand, she had told him- _Philip_ \- George's biggest secret. That was, in George's eyes, unforgivable. But she hadn't told him much, really. Just that there was some problem with George's sister. Plus, it wasn't like Philip had asked about it at all, or made a big deal about it. And Theo had just become friends with Philip again. Maybe George could let it slide. It really wasn't _that_ big of a deal in the scheme of things.

But no, no, he couldn't quite do it. He wouldn't confront them; he wouldn't talk to them at all. Anything he said would probably make everything worse. He worried about Theodosia. He worried about her because of Philip- while he might be shy and insecure sometimes, George knew what Philip could be like if he got ahead of himself: rash, boastful, and fatally loyal. He'd seen it happen. Not often, but it did. Besides, George knew what Philip's father was like. Mostly, he worried about Theodosia because it was obvious that Philip liked her. Had _fallen_ for her, even. If his dad was as bad as the news made him sound, what would happen to anyone Philip ended up falling for? True love certainly hadn't stopped Alexander Hamilton from being true.

Good Lord, what if Theodosia fell for _Philip_?


	19. Christmas

**Notes: *Larry the Cucumber voice*** ** _It's Christmaaaaaas_**

 **Ok, not really, but it is for our dear Philip. Sorry if this chapter is sort of rambly or random, it was fun to write and I wanted to develop Angie more. Also WHY DO THE HAMILTONS AND THE CHURCHES HAVE SO MANY FRICKING KIDS**

 **And side note- does anyone mind if I start to use swear words? It just seems weird to write teenagers without them. There probably won't be too many, but idrk.**

 **Thanks for comments, faves, and follows! Enjoy!**

*****December 24- the Hamilton household*****

The dinner table was full of laughter and joy, with conversations overlapping and giggles erupting from everyone's mouths. It was Christmas Eve, and the Hamilton household was overflowing with residents and visitors. Not that the Hamiltons had ever been extremely religious, but they celebrated the holiday anyway as a tradition and a time to see relatives. As the family had seven children plus two parents, and frequently attracted visitors, the house was big, and accommodated all the Christmas guests well. Even so, they were pressed for space. Still, it was an enjoyable event. The children were interspersed around the table. John was sitting upright and looking solemn as ever while he talked, mildly surprising for a seven-year-old on Christmas Eve. Two-year-old Billy was staring intently at Grandpa Philip while Al talked excitedly to an uncle about middle school. James was enjoying a conversation with a cousin about Harry Potter, with his mother looking on, amused, holding baby Lizzie in her arms. Only Philip and Angie didn't seem to be contributing much to the general buzz, just listening and watching and occasionally sharing glances. They had grown closer during the time when Philip and Theodosia hadn't spoken much, and while Angie was only fifteen, she seemed to understand all of Philip's rants and problems having to do with life in general. It was a nice bond to have, although rocky and sometimes violent, as most sibling bonds seem to be.

There was more family visiting, too. Auntie Angelica and Uncle John were there with 21-year-old Phil, 20-year-old Kitty, 18-year-old Jack, 16-year-old Betsy, 14-year-old Richard, 7-year-old Xander, and 1-year-old Stephen. Grandpa Philip and Grandma Catharine also sat at the extremely full table. Aunt Peggy and her family couldn't come, but Philip figured that was for the better, because there wasn't much room left anyway.

The dinner was fun and exciting and whatever, but most kids can agree that at no age does the night of Christmas Eve stop being fun. Whether you like the presents more or the family time spent together, Christmas Morning is eagerly awaited through the night. Philip certainly couldn't wait for the morning. What he loved most about Christmas was the season- the smell, the noise, the excitement. He also loved the feeling of tradition, harmless tradition that everyone loves. One of the family "traditions" for Christmas Eve- although it was only started because it had to be- was sharing rooms.

The Hamilton house had eight rooms that could be used as bedrooms, normally using one per kid and keeping Lizzie in Alexander and Eliza's room in a crib. However, at Christmas or any other big party, it was a tight fit to get everyone in. Mostly the kids were grouped by twos or threes by age, but that wasn't really consistent. Jack and Billy shared a room, for example, so that the 18-year-old could watch over the toddler. It was a pretty good system. It was, that is, until yet another child was inevitably born into one of the families, making everything a tighter squeeze.

Even though the house was bursting with people, Philip didn't mind. He liked Christmas Eve, and he liked spending the night with Angie. _We really should hang out more, even though I have Theodosia back now_ , he thought, pulling on his pajamas and entering the room.

The room they shared was usually Angie's, and it was obviously so. Hot pink curtains hung by the windows. The floor had been "tidied", probably on orders from their mother, but was still sort of a mess. It was obvious that most of the stuff had been crammed into the closet, including evidence of her athletic life: a softball bat, a soccer ball, a tennis racket, a basketball pump. Philip unrolled a dark blue sleeping bag on an empty patch of carpet, as Angie had- rather violently- claimed the bed earlier that night. He settled in as his sister came into the room, wearing a soft pink shirt and stripey pants.

"What's up, loser?" She asked with a smile, flopping down onto the bed.

"Hey, shut up. It's not nice to call people names on Christmas," he responded with a grin.

"Not Christmas yet."

"Fair."

They were quiet for a bit before continuing their conversation. Christmas Eve is for staying up late. Philip forgot how much he'd relied on Angie while his friend group was broken up. Other than after school then, he really didn't hang out with her much. Of course, they did walk home together and eat together and things like that, but Christmas Eve was really the only time when they were alone and just being siblings.

Philip also realized how out of the loop he'd been about Angie's life. She talked a lot, with rapid-fire words, but Philip tuned out most conversations that didn't involve him until he was speaking. It was a bad quality of his, he was often told by teachers and parents and even peers.

It was only around Angie that Philip really wondered what it was like to know who you were. Angie had been openly ace/aro since eighth grade, was _the athletic one_ and _the talkative one_ , and always seemed to be confident that she was who she wanted to be. Philip was _the shy one_ at school, but _the rash one_ at everything else where he felt uncomfortable, or so he was told by other people. He never noticed where he ended up in terms of groups. He was pretty confident about his sexuality, sure, but crushes themselves? Those were confusing as hell. Plus friendships, and decisions, and _gahhhh-_

"How do you do it?" He mumbled, lost in this thought.

"Huh?" Angie looked confused. She'd probably been talking about something like softball or her friend Rebecca's newest boyfriend, something she knew wouldn't interest Philip but didn't resist from chattering about. "What do you mean?"

Philip looked up. "I dunno, you just seem to know what you're doing, I guess."

"I… still don't understand."

"I mean, you're confident, and you're sociable, and you don't have to worry about crushes or anything…"

He was cut off by her exasperated stare. "Oh, come _on_ , Philip. Just because I'm aromantic and extroverted, doesn't mean my life is totally free of problems. There's friend drama. Family drama. It's a life, just like yours or anyone's. I don't want to sound like I'm begging for pity, but if you really think that my life is _that_ easy, well, that's just bull-"

Footsteps outside. Years of practice finally coming in handy, the duo dropped to their sides and closed their eyes, slowing their breathing to make it look like they were asleep.

The door creaked open, and Philip could see through his eyelashes light from the hallway seeping in. There were some whispers, and a final "Good night!" spoken softly by someone easily identified as the teenagers' mom. The door closed, the footsteps left, and all was silent again.

They waited a few minutes before sitting up again. Angie looked at Philip.

"Really, though, it's not easy. Maybe yours isn't either, but I still have plenty of fears, dislikes, worries."

"D'you worry about me?" Philip asked, a joking tone to his voice.

"Shut up, you doofus!" Angie laughed quietly. "Of course I do… not!"

Philip stuck his tongue out in the dark. Maybe she was right. Maybe her life was just as weird and confusing as his. But she sure was good at hiding it if that was true.

"Hey," he whispered into the dark. "Don't insult people on Christmas!"

"Isn't Christmas yet."

"Will be in… four minutes and thirty-nine seconds."

"Well then."

"G'night, Angie."

"G'night, Phil."

Quiet.


	20. Morning Sun

**Notes: YO this is probably a mess but ha I'm posting it anyway! Yay!**

 **Not much else to say except that I've been collabing with my good friend girlinblack137 lately on a series taking place in a separate universe. She's got two stories for it so far (** ** _The Story of Tonight_** **and** ** _To Say Congratulations_** **) and I've got one that goes in between those (** ** _Wonders Great and Small_** **) and I'm working on another now, so if you're interested, it'd be cool if you checked those out. Anyways, comments, favorites, and follows are appreciated as always! (also check out my tumblr it's** **soliloquies-and-sweets** **thx bye)**

*****December 28- the Eacker household*****

George and Philip had gone to Morning Sun Summer Camp for together, after their fourth grade year.

It wasn't a time George particularly liked remembering, and mostly he closed it out of his mind. He knew that Theodosia knew they had run into each other there, but she didn't really know any of what happened. They never brought it up. Philip, as far as George knew, never talked about it either. Why would he? Why would either of them? Morning Sun was in Maryland, a trek from New York, and it hadn't been a good experience. It wasn't like the two boys hung out or anything- no, they made every effort to stay away from each other. There were other people to talk to, and Theo wasn't there keeping them together. It was their time to be separate.

Unfortunately, it was also a time when George got to see a new side of Philip, who he just couldn't seem to shake. That was why, in light of recent events regarding Philip and Theodosia, George was recalling times he didn't really want to relive.

* * *

 _*****Morning Sun Summer Camp, day 1- summer after grade four*****_

" _George? Why are you here?"_

 _George spun around. "Philip?"_

 _They stared at each other for a second, before Philip turned around and marched off rather haughtily._

 _George didn't care. He could find his own friends._

* * *

 _*****Morning Sun Summer Camp- Day 1*****_

 _George could hear Philip talking. Philip didn't talk that much back home, at least not around George and Theodosia, but here, he just wouldn't shut up. "My dad did this." "My dad's famous for that." "My dad knows President Washington!" "My dad was in the army!" "My dad is super rich and powerful and works for the government!" George was sick of it. And Philip was loud, too. It was infuriating how no matter how far away he went, George just couldn't seem to get away from Philip's loud, annoying chatter. There was no end to it!_ At least he's not like this too much at home _, George thought, sighing._

* * *

 _*****Morning Sun Summer Camp- Day 2*****_

What was his problem? _George wondered, frustrated. Now Philip was standing on top of a table, surrounded by girls. It was so_ stupid _, from George's point of view! He could hear Philip telling the girls how pretty they all were, maybe in a vain attempt to flirt. It just seemed so dumb to George. And of course, Philip wouldn't stop being like this until the counselor told him off. Which wouldn't be for a while._

 _Ugh._

* * *

 _*****Morning Sun Summer Camp- Day 3*****_

 _The problem wasn't just how obnoxious and arrogant and loudmouthed Philip was being that annoyed George, it was the fact that Philip seemed so focused on being remembered. From what George had heard, Philip's father was similar. Maybe that's where he got it from. But it was incredibly pointless! He supposed Philip was being like that here because he knew he was unlikely to see these people again, so he didn't have to worry about hiding who he really was around them. George figured he would always be like this if he could: obsessed with "being remembered", which didn't matter at all, at least not in this situation, loud, infuriating, rude, gaaAAHHHH how much more could George take? When would the madness end?_

* * *

 _*****Morning Sun Summer Camp- Day 4*****_

 _Philip got sent home early for being "rude, disrespectful, and unruly. Parents should note that we don't do this often, as our camp is focussed on letting children be independent, but Philip's behavior was too disruptive for the other campers and we got several complaints that his lack of manners was causing campers to, in short, cry. If Philip is sent back next year, we will need him to have a little more tact than he did this time. We are sorry for any inconvenience. Please take this as a warning."_

 _Exactly what Philip did, other than just being extremely vocal and irritating, George didn't know. He did know, however, that it was… peaceful after Philip left. No one minded him being gone, much, either, except maybe a few of the girls who used to flock around the table he would stand on._

 _Alexander Hamilton, George later heard, tried to sue the camp soon after Philip was sent home. Mostly the reason he didn't was because of pressures from his wife, but that didn't stop him from publishing a news article about what happened, antagonizing the camp. And if that didn't paint Philip Hamilton as the spoiled rich brat that George always assumed he was, well, not much really did._

* * *

This was why George wanted to keep Philip away from Theodosia. This was partly why they'd never gotten along, but honestly, George had never liked Philip much in the first place. That much was evident. Still, as he feared a growing more-than-friends relationship between Philip and Theodosia growing, George couldn't help but remember all the times Philip had been too arrogant, boastful, and pompous for his own good- and for anyone around him.

George had to make sure Theodosia, a person he just couldn't keep himself from trusting and protecting, wasn't hurt by Philip. He couldn't let them get too close to each other romantically, because if Alexander Hamilton is as true to his wife as he revealed, and if Philip picked up that many traits from his father, Theo wasn't safe. Maybe it was George's long-lasting friendship with Theo, or his long-lasting hatred of Philip, but he had to stop whatever was growing between them. Soon. Fast.


	21. Catching UpNew Years Resolutions

**Notes: I have a list of things. This will be a long notes section. Sorry.**

 **1\. I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN SO LONG I'M SO SORRY! My main excuse is that school is KICKING MY ASS but I'm also just... lazy...**

 **2\. I SAW HAMILTON! In Chicago! It was really good! I cried a lot! Ahhhh! Feel free to PM me if you want to here me ramble about how wonderful it was**

 **3\. This is pretty short, so sorry about that, I just wanted to get something up.**

 **4\. I have the rest of the story vaguely planned out. We might be skipping ahead in time in the next chapter. Also if anyone has been to prom and wants to tell me many details about it: PM ME I NEED YOUR HELP**

 **5\. A very merry Christmas/happy holidays/whatever to everyone reading this! I hope you all got a lot of hugs and money and whatever else you might have wanted in general, no matter what you celebrated!**

 **6** **. ok but did anyone who's reading this listen to Night Vale episode 100? PM me if you did because it was so good amirite**

 **7\. I think that's all, so enjoy! Comments loved, favorites appreciated, and follows rejoiced at as always!**

He couldn't get her out of his mind.

He knew it sounded cheesy, and a little creepy, but he couldn't think about anything else. Or rather, everything he thought about led to her.

Philip saw signs in the hall advertising prom and wished he could ask her out. He remembered that awful and awfully strange day in Yorktown Coffee with George… and her. He listened to Angie talk about some girl that her friend liked, but the only person in his head was Theodosia.

It was funny, the more he started realizing that he liked her, the more he fell for her. The more he could imagine running his fingers through her long, black curls. The more he could envision her beautiful eyes staring into his. The more he could see himself kissing her.

He sighed. What the heck did he have to do to either make these feelings go away, or to be with her?

* * *

George was tired of being friends with Theodosia. He felt a fierce need to protect her, and to make sure no one hurt her, sure. And no, he didn't think she was to blame for Philip's arrogant and irritating nature. But it was just so _exhausting_ to be around her if Philip was going to stand in the way of their friendship. So no, it wasn't fair, to him or to Theo, but he figured it was time for him to fade away. Nothing messy, nothing angry. It would hurt him, but if he did it right, maybe it wouldn't hurt anyone else.

He didn't want to leave Theodosia behind, but he had to stop. The closer he looked, the more obvious it was to him that she liked Philip. Romantically? George wasn't sure. But maybe it would be okay for them to be together, if George kept an eye on them from farther away. Maybe Philip could control himself, keep his mouth shut, make Theo happy. Maybe it was time for George to let go.

* * *

*****December 31- the Hamilton household's basement*****

"New Year's Eve used to be a lot more fun before, well, you know…" Angie shrugged as her face shone in the light of a flashlight in the dark basement. It was true. The Hamilton family used to have a huge New Year's party at their house, full of friends and fun, but after the Reynolds Affair was exposed, many of their celebrations like that came to an end. After the mild healing between Alexander and Eliza, some, like the Christmas party, had been reborn, but the New Year's party remained a thing of the past. Nevertheless, the children of the family liked to hold their own makeshift gathering in the house's basement. Now, with seven of them in total, including baby Lizzie being held by Al and little Billy in James' lap, the basement sofa arrangement was completely full.

"Alright, guys," Angie said, standing up, with pieces of paper and freshly-sharpened pencils in her hands. "We're all gonna make lists of New Year's resolutions."

"Says who?" Complained John.

"Says me. Come on, no one else will have to read it. In fact, you can, I don't know, burn it as soon as you write it if you really don't want to keep it. But write something, okay? Just think about it."

Philip nodded, and as conversation in the room began to pick back up, he sat out, thinking about his resolutions. He could write the traditional things, like "Exercise!" or "Eat a healthier diet," but if he was being completely honest, he would write, "Talk to Theodosia." Or "Flirt with Theodosia." Or… whatever. Prom was coming up, after all. He didn't want to wait too long, and his feelings were eating him up inside.

In all truthfulness, he wasn't sure if he'd be able to take Theo to prom, and he definitely had great doubts that she reciprocated his feelings in any way at all. But his New Year's resolution wasn't to necessarily accomplish those goals. He just needed to try.


	22. please read this (not a chapter)

**Alright, this is gonna be a bit of a note. Sorry it isn't an update! I do recommend reading to the end, though, because there could be some important information.**

 **I'm, uh, obviously not regularly updating anymore? And that probably won't change anytime soon?**

 **I know what I want to do with the story, but I'm not really motivated to finish. I'm not really writing fanfic anymore either, or even reading it** ** _that_** **much. Long story short, I'm probably gonna abandon this fic.**

 **SORRY EVERYONE**

 **HOWEVER, I do still want this story to get finished, if possible. So, and this is very important, please contact me if you would be interested in continuing it! All the information for that will be below. PLEASE help me out if you want to write the rest! I'd love to see that happen!**

 **And hey, to all my readers out there, I'm... sorry? But also I just want to tell you** ** _thank you_** **and I treasure you all. I talk more at the very end of the page, but mostly, thank you to everyone who supported this story. You're all fabulous.**

 **ALL IMPORTANT INFO**

 **1\. How do I enter?**

The best thing to do would be to shoot me an email at **telepathictimelord180** with the information included below. If you don't feel comfortable doing that, **post a comment** on this "chapter" with the same information. I'd strongly prefer the email, if that's possible for you.

 **2\. How long do I have to enter?**

I'll be leaving the submissions open until **April 30th, 2017** , unless no one responds, in which case I'll post another chapter with an updated date.

 **3\. What information do I need to include in my entry?**

All I need in the initial email/comment is your **username**.

 **4\. What next?**

As soon as I see a submission email/comment (it may take a few days), I'll respond saying I received it. On May 1st (or whatever ends up being the day after the submissions close), **I will send another email/private message** to each candidate with more information. If you're the chosen candidate/only candidate and you decide to take the job, we will discuss plans for the story (I'll offer my ideas, which you don't _have_ to take) and the logistics for the transfer of ownership.

 **5\. Anything else I need to know?**

a. I don't expect to get multiple requests, if any at all, but if more than one person wants the job, and you don't end up getting chosen, how about writing a spinoff fic? I'll read it if you send me the link!

b. I also have this story on Ao3, so if possible, chapters could be uploaded there as well after the transfer.

c. There's absolutely NO PRESSURE. If you are worried that your writing skills will be subpar, don't worry. Writing a multi-chapter fic can help you improve your skills.

d. I plan to read the story as it goes on! I'm looking forward to seeing it evolve!

e. If the future author ever feels like they'd no longer like to write the story, let me know first through email/pm and we'll figure something out.

 **So, I guess that's goodbye for now from me! We'll see what happens in the future. Thank you all so much for all your support over the course of this story so far. I've treasured all your comments, follows, favorites, and general reading of my work. And remember, if you want to continue the story, DO NOT BE AFRAID to try! Whatever ends up happening, I'm sure it'll work out. In the meantime, sorry I won't be finishing this myself, but I look forward to whatever future it ends up having. Thanks again for everything!**

 **:)**


	23. please read this too (alsonot a chapter)

**Good news all! DipperGleeful123 has officially taken over this story! You can find their continuation, starting with chapter 22, here: s/12476861/1/This-story-will-be-on-TelepathicTimelord123-account-i-m-just-writing**

 **Please be supporting of them and give them feedback if you can. I'm endlessly grateful to them for taking it over and I'm looking forward to seeing what they do with it, so I hope you are too! Obviously it will be a new voice and perhaps will take some getting used to, but I can assure you it'll be** ** _pretty darn snazzy_** **.**

 **Anyway, this is goodbye, I guess. Again, it's been rad!**

 **Happy reading,**

 **TelepathicTimelord180**


	24. another update haha

**Hey friends-**

 **So I've received a review from a Guest with a few comments and questions about the new fic, but because that person wasn't signed in, I can't reply to them. Then I thought that some of their questions could be useful to everyone (or anyone) else, so I'm going to address one of them here.**

 **Among other points, the Guest asked about (I'm paraphrasing here) others, including themself, possibly continuing the story. This could be due to a number of reasons- didn't see the entry note until it was too late, disagrees with DipperGleeful123's approach, or just wanting to write for it in general, to name a few. Unfortunately I only received one entry after I posted the note about entering, but if you want to continue the story yourself for whatever reason, go right ahead!**

 **Just make sure to: 1. please credit me in the notes/description/summary/whatever, and 2. send me the link so I can read it and put it in an update here so others can enjoy it too!**

 ***thumbs up* byee**


End file.
